WTF: Marles mischief, Avalon Signal, toes out on the train

Some passengers are getting particularly comfortable in the quiet carriage, should it be allowed? HAVE YOUR SAY

WTF

They’re the little – and sometimes not so little – things that can really irk us … and they’re back! A new slot, on a new page with the same old problems that have us all saying, woah, that’s frustrating!

Marles Mischief

Deputy Prime Minister and Minister for Defence, Richard Marles during Question Time at Parliament House in Canberra. Picture: NewsWire / Martin Ollman

Ah, election time.

The sight of corflutes, and the sound of impossible to understand jargon.

It is also, as we like to say here at WTF HQ, skulldugery season.

And what a season it has been thus far, look no further than the campaign launch for Liberal Darren Buller.

But as we continue to not hear a peep from Mr Buller, only from Liberal campaign headquarters that he has made no funding announcements, we turn our attention to Geelong’s silver fox minister for defence.

Richard Marles is essentially running unopposed in Corio.

And while ‘Marlesy’ is doing a great job of not breaking election laws, he’s definitely getting on the nerves of a few Geelong citizens.

This week, many households across Geelong received unbranded letters featuring information on how to apply for a postal vote.

It isn’t until you actually open the letter, that you learn its correspondence from ‘Marlesy’ himself, asking for your name, number, email, address etc etc.

“It’s a bit rotten I reckon,” a concerned Corio voter said.

“I could see people thinking this was an official form.”

But that wasn’t all that caught the eye of the voter.

Her grievances flared when, while waiting at South Geelong station, a red shirted ‘Marlesy’ volunteer made the most of current bus replacements to attempt to woo a few potential Labor voters.

“One of the Greens candidates did it during the council campaign, but at least he stood on Yarra St,” she said.

“This volunteer was set up right at the bus waiting area, they were unavoidable.”

The deputy PM is paying $1.01 to take out the seat of Corio.

Avalon Signal

WTF: Avalon Signal Message

The US defence department was shaken to its core late last month when the Atlantic’s editor in chief was sent attack plans after being added to a Signal group chat.

So you could forgive the Avalon Airshow’s VIPs for thinking they too were in the middle of Signal chat scandal, when it seemed Airshow organisers started a rather large group chat including dozens of its special guests.

One of the first post in the exclusive chat was a series of curious “codes”.

“Bhp oh p XXwb p des WWW es um d d !” the message read.

“Fbwb w cnbin dann TwC! DzT? F rreavd veue ca fr!, dfcwqcscqc e c, ff.”

Now, while we here at WTF wouldn’t know the meaning of being a VIP, we are assured by some of the suit and tie types within News that this is not some sort of coded language of the shadowy elites.

Further investigation reveals the unknown sender of the message may be learning German, with one of the messages containing the greeting “gruß”.

While some were concerned, others had their worries quelled by the author’s send off, an emoji of a cat jumping out of a cardboard box while waving at the reader.

WTF: Avalon Signal Message

If we hadn’t lost you, making you read about the gripes of Avalon’s VIPs, we’ve got a dead horse of the masses to flog.

The time honoured biennial tradition of poor access to the airshow was again renewed at this year’s event.

“It took three hours and 15 mins and the premium parking for $70 could not have been further away from the gate,” a punter said.

“I know public transport was encouraged but two years ago you just sat on the bus for two hours so we thought why not do that in our own car.

“Sounds like they got the public transport right this year but the parking was a joke. “Everything they had advertised promised people it was all fixed from previous years.”

Toes Out On The Train

WTF: Feet on the train

As previously mentioned Geelong commuters are currently suffering through another fortnight of bus replacements.

It happens every year, the tracks need maintenance, work has to be done on the South Geelong tunnels, punters get it.

But an image from the Geelong line which surfaced last week might have passengers thanking their lucky stars they aren’t catching the train.

WTF was sent a picture of one customer heading from Southern Cross to Geelong, feet up, shoes off.

Dogs are allowed on V/Line services, but only if they’re in a suitable container, so maybe think about wearing shoes in the future.

That’s without pointing out the feet on the seat fine.

Rough Surface

Now they’re just rubbing our noses in it.

Heavy vehicle traffic has always taken its toll on the pavement on Boundary Rd separating East Geelong and Newcomb.

Drivers were pleased when state road authorities rebuilt a section running south from Portarlington Rd up the hill toward the Bellarine Highway.

But it has always stuck in the craw of local motorists who traverse the beautifully smooth stretch of pavement when it abruptly runs out half way up the hill at Boronia St, leaving many to wonder why they didn’t buy that big four wheel drive to tackle the ensuing goat track.

Beyond that, the patchwork of patches and potholes continues to the crest of the hill approaching the traffic lights at the end of Ormond Rd.

Apparently that was always the plan, with social media communications at the time stipulating the project would only ever replace the pavement between Ryrie and Boronia streets.

So it feels as if it’s all become a sick joke in the corridors of power at the Department of Transport to order a brand new sign be placed just before the intersection with the Bellarine Highway warning motorists of the “rough surface” for the next 300m.

That’s obviously a low-cost solution in a debt-ridden state where routine road maintenance is apparently taking a back seat as Spring Street assures us there is funding for a certain suburban railway tunnel in Melbourne’s east.

Of course, that seems to be standard procedure these days, leading to the coroner recently telling the government to get its act together and fix a stretch of the Bellarine Highway at Wallington where the state of the road, combined with wet weather, contributed to a tragic deadly outcome. Work finally got underway in Wallington last week.

Originally published as WTF: Marles mischief, Avalon Signal, toes out on the train