Samantha Armytage’s biggest celebrity disappointment

Samantha Armytage has revealed how one international celebrity let her down, saying it had her reaching for a ‘large G&T’

There’s an old saying that you should never meet your heroes, given that those you have held in high regard from afar often result in disappointment close-up.

And so it goes that a person who lives in California, whom I don’t know but nonetheless have held in high regard, has failed to fulfil my expectations.

Before you think I’m some kind of sheep, blindly following Hollywood propaganda, this hero was no overpaid, underwhelming actress.

This was Marie Kondo. A woman who gently nurtured us through several Covid lockdowns and – along the way – eventually re-sparked our joy.

Samantha Armytage: ‘But I know perfection doesn’t exist – not on Instagram, not on Netflix and certainly not in real life.’ Picture: Damian Bennett for ○.

A professional tidier who brought the basics of Shintoism into our crammed cupboards, and unburdened our souls in the process.

Recently my mate Marie (we’ve never met) did an interview (she has a new book out) and confessed – shock, horror – that she has, and I quote, “kind of given up” on keeping her own home tidy.

She then continued to talk about how, now that she’s got three children, her place mis a mess, blah, blah... I stopped reading after that.

There’s another old saying: Kids are like farts – your own are OK, but other people’s are unbearable. Sorry for being crass, but it’s true. Marie’s admission had me in a spin.

And it had the Internet in a spin, too. The social-media mob howled for her head, claiming they’d been Kon-ned (which, unlike everything else on Twitter, I found quite amusing).

But it got me thinking, as not only did Marie spark joy, she also sparked six books, two Netflix series and, I’d say, a very spark-ly bank balance.

Just what lengths will people go to to get a giant Netflix deal? Next you’ll be telling me nothing on television is true: that the people on Married At First Sight are actually looking for love; and Summer Bay and Midsomer really do have that much crime.

Now Ms Kondo says we should be decluttering our time, rather than our cupboards.

Right, OK. Methinks those producers at Netflix maybe needed a hook for a new series.

Meanwhile, I’m still trying to fold my undies into tiny rosettes, rolling up my jumpers and telling my jeans each day how much bliss they bring me. (I lie to them, they don’t.) Marie says she and her husband now find other ways to spark joy, including burning incense and drinking a cup of tea.

Samantha Armytage features in this Sunday’s Stellar. Picture: Damian Bennett for Stellar.

I know these people live in California, but this made me reach for a bucket, followed by a very large gin and tonic.

And the good thing about a stiff drink is that sometimes it brings clarity.

I realise Marie just wanted us to make meaningful choices and find gratitude in everyday things.

But I know perfection doesn’t exist – not on Instagram, not on Netflix and certainly not in real life.

In fact, it makes me quite happy to now know that Marie has a messy house – and that, perhaps, when the kids are in bed, she puts her feet up... and treats herself to a large G&T.

Originally published as Samantha Armytage’s biggest celebrity disappointment