Paediatric psychologist's top tips for when your kid hates a Christmas present

Amanda is a mum and knows what it feels like in that awkward moment when your child lacks a Christmas poker face. Or worse, when they declare: "I already have that!"

What to do when your child clearly shows they don't like a present they get. Image: iStock

As a mum, I absolutely love seeing the excitement of a child receiving a gift - especially at Christmas time. 

However, it's essential to remember that toddlers are still learning the social skills and emotional regulation required to navigate these situations.

As gift-giving season begins, here are some ideas to help both you and your toddler enjoy other people's generosity in the upcoming festive season with ease and understanding.

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1. Understanding Toddler Reactions

Normalising varied responses: Toddlers may not always say "thank you" immediately when receiving a gift, and that's perfectly normal.

Like adults, they too can find it challenging to express gratitude, especially if the gift isn't what they expected.

2. Preparing Your Toddler

Role-playing gift receiving: Engage in role-play games where you practise giving and receiving gifts. Include scenarios with gifts they might love and some they might not be as excited about.

Modelling gratitude: Demonstrate how to receive gifts gracefully. Your reaction to gifts can be a powerful lesson for your child.

Talk through expectations: Discuss with your toddler what will happen when they receive gifts, setting a clear and calm precedent.

RELATED: The ultimate guide to handmade Christmas gifts

3. Respecting Their Pace

Let them open gifts on their terms: If your toddler is reluctant to open gifts immediately, that’s okay. Capture these moments on video to share with the gift giver later.

Avoiding pressure: Steer clear of forcing your child to open all gifts at once. This respects their autonomy and comfort level.

4. Encouraging Polite Behavior Without Guilt

Avoid guilt-tripping: Phrases like “you’re making grandma sad by not saying thank you” can be counterproductive. Instead, focus on positive reinforcement and understanding.

Proactive skill building: Work with your toddler in calm moments to prepare them for gift receiving. This can include practising saying thank you and expressing appreciation.

5. Managing Expectations

Relatives and parenting styles: Not all family members may understand your approach to gift-receiving etiquette. Remember, it’s okay if things don’t go as planned. Kids aren’t robots, and flexibility is key.

Enjoying the moment: Embrace the joy and don't strive for perfection in every interaction. Celebrate the wonderful moments as they come - this makes the less-than-wonderful moments bearable!

The worst is when the teen appears ungrateful. Image: iStock

RELATED: The two Christmas wrapping hacks you need to know

6. Addressing Anticipation and Anxiety

Unwrapped gifts for anxious toddlers: If your child feels anxious about the unknown aspect of wrapped gifts, consider not wrapping them. Having toys ready to play with can also minimise stress and enhance enjoyment - so popping batteries in before wrapping presents can work well.

Gift-receiving with toddlers doesn't have to be stressful. By understanding their developmental stage, preparing them through role-play, and respecting their individual reactions, you can create a joyful and less pressured environment for everyone. Remember, the key is to foster an atmosphere of patience, empathy, and understanding, making gift-receiving a positive experience for all involved.

Amanda Abel is a paediatric psychologist, mum, founder of Northern Centre for Child Development, and co-founder of the Toddler Toolkit. Amanda’s mission is for every child to achieve their best outcomes by equipping families and educators with the tools they need to help kids thrive.

Originally published as Paediatric psychologist's top tips for when your kid hates a Christmas present