‘Our three kids saw us having sex… I’m worried they’ll be traumatised’

“The little ones didn’t seem to register much, but our seven-year-old had been watching for a while without us realising,” the mortified mum reveals.

Joanne and Morgan have a full house: three kids aged seven, three and six months, and a fourth on the way, so any private time – to go to the toilet, to get dressed, to have sex – is tough to carve out.

The family had just come back from holiday when the couple found themselves alone in their bedroom.

“I started a bit of unpacking and my husband got touchy and one thing led to another,” she wrote in a Reddit post.

Usually when things start to get frisky, they lock the bedroom door, but on this occasion, they forgot.

“Both my husband and I were not facing the door and did not have any blanket or clothing on. We didn’t notice the kids until we were done and I hear our three-year-old cried out for me.

“My head snapped towards the door and I saw our middle child sort of crying.

“He looked like he just got in the room but our eldest looked like he was there for a while.”

They tried to get dressed without panicking, and then Joanne cuddled the three-year-old, who immediately fell asleep.

Then they sat their eldest down and asked what he saw. “He pretty much saw us just before the climax.”

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Joanne was scared her eldest son would be traumatised. Photo: iStock

Parents worried after kids see them having sex

They tried to make the best of it, having a conversation about how babies are made.

“We explained it to him sort of this way. ‘Remember how when mummy gets a baby in her tummy, it’s because daddy puts the seed inside? Well daddy puts the seed inside mummy using his penis and it passes through mummy’s vagina and daddy kisses mummy to make sure it doesn’t hurt’,” she said.

“He seems kinda okay but quiet. He did ask if that means there will be a baby soon… then we put them all back to bed.”

Joanne was mortified. She wondered if the kids would be traumatised by what they saw.

Plenty of people were impressed at the fact that they were able to have sex while Joanne was pregnant and had a six-month-old baby.

“The real question is, how are you managing to have sex with a six-month-old around AND first trimester pregnant?” one person asked. “Because I was a zombie at both of those stages individually. Together? OMG.”

“I have a four-year-old and I’m still struggling,” said another. “Teach us your ways!”

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Others thought the explanation was hilarious.

“You have a better explanation than I did when I told my child I had a leg cramp and daddy was trying to help me stretch it,” said one person. “Your kids will be totally fine.”

“Mine was, ‘Mummy and daddy were wrestling and playing. Daddy was tickling mummy’,” said another.

Another person hilariously suggested a dark future was in store for her kids.

“I’m sorry, but it’s over,” they said. “Your three-year-old might make it, but your eldest is now on the path to supervillainy. Every tear shed, every insult spoken, every village burned – all because junior saw his parents having sex.”

Originally published as ‘Our three kids saw us having sex… I’m worried they’ll be traumatised’