I was forced to move from my booked plane seat for a baby right before takeoff

"I got that seat on the day my dad died in a car crash for an important reason... I should have been arrested for what happened after I was made to swap."

It was my 36th birthday and it began with 40 missed calls on my phone. 

My five-year-old and I were holidaying on the Gold Coast and had planned a big day of celebrating.

But my sister called with the worst news: overnight, our dad had been a passenger in a car crash with another vehicle. He had died at the scene.

We flew home immediately, which is the only reason why we ended up on the same flight as some of the most selfish people I've ever encountered.

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Nama Winston is not a fan of musical chairs on planes. Source: supplied

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"A shell of my usual self"

I didn't even try to change our return flight ahead of time. We just rocked up to the airport with our bags packed, and I went straight to the desk. Normally I'm such a careful planner, always selecting seats ahead of time, but that day we needed whatever we could get.

I explained to airline staff that we had to get on the next flight, and shared why; we managed to nab the row they leave for emergency travel like ours.

In fact, Qantas purposefully put us there because the third seat would be empty, and we could have a little space.

When the ground staff told me that, I was so grateful and thanked them profusely; my son could spread some toys/colouring out and between that and the window, and would be occupied for the three-hour flight, which I desperately needed him to be, because my mind was spinning.

My kid was an angel, but I was in shock in a way I had never been before.

The other reason why I was relieved to be alone in a row with my son was that I had not been able to stop crying. All day.

I couldn't get the image out of my mind about what my dad's last moments would have been like; seeing the headlights of the oncoming car, he must have known he was going to die.

But did he die when the car hit him, or when his car then smashed into a building? Did anyone help him? 

My mind was overwhelmed with so many questions, and to know that my beloved dad had died in such a sudden and violent way... I was a shell of my usual self.

I always like to board a plane on time, and so we did. We settled in for the three hour flight, my little one's face pressed against the window, me sitting in the middle seat telling him I was okay, through sobs.

And then just as the door was about to close, two adults with a baby stumbled onboard in a mad rush.

My son was around this age at the time. Source: supplied

"I stormed up the aisle"

Normally, I wouldn't have given them a second glance, but a fuss was happening... as they spotted us and realised there was a chance for them to have a row to themselves. 

Instead of just the two seats they'd paid for - and the baby was their excuse to kick us out.

Cabin crew came over to me and explained that the couple were insisting that WE move to their two seats, so they could spread out with the baby.

Oh, to have the arrogance and entitlement of such people. Boarding last, demanding where to sit, and forcing others to comply.

I think in my state the only reason I agreed was that I didn't want to talk; I just wanted to get home. I silently uprooted us and moved to the row where the couple was meant to sit. 

There was no thank you from them, but I barely noticed because the first thing I saw when I went to sit down was there was no window in the row. It was just wall. No window.

No window to help distract my son on the worst plane trip I'd ever be on. I know babies are important, but I was furious with the entitled parents.

Admittedly, there was a lovely young woman in the row, ready to help engage my child. 

But just two minutes later, as we were gaining speed to take off, I chose to cause my own fuss. I ripped open my seatbelt and tore up the aisle to where the crew was seated.

I'd had enough for one day.

"I was shown the most incredible kindness"

I didn't get far up the aisle, because one of them calmly called out, "Ma'am, you must be seated for takeoff." His words stopped me in my tracks, and I turned around to a cabin full of glares and scared faces. I realised I must have looked hysterical (which I was).

But then, a wonderful thing happened.

When the seatbelt sign was switched off, that crew member came over to me immediately. He knelt down and asked, "How can I help you?"

He listened as I told him about the day through tears. For the rest of the flight, he kept me in red wine, my son in snacks and food, and he even organised for our bags to be found and removed from the flight first. They were waiting at the carousel when we arrived.

He also came to us so we could be first to disembark.

When I needed it the most, I was shown the most incredible kindness. I've tried to find that crew member over the years, to tell him what he meant to us that day. It was everything.

I've reached out to Qantas a few times, with no response.

And as for that couple? We're reading more and more about people's rude and selfish behaviour on planes every day; and I think of them and thank them for being a**holes, because I never would have met that kind-hearted crew member if it weren't for their gross behaviour. 

This story was first published in November 2022, and updated in January 2025 - because I'm still looking for the Qantas staff  member who chose to help instead of have me arrested.

Originally published as I was forced to move from my booked plane seat for a baby right before takeoff