Bachelor break-up: ‘You’re not God, stop dicking around’

MATTY J sent contestant Liz packing last night with a painful, extended ‘It’s not you, it’s me’ speech. Now she has a message for this year’s Bachelor.

BACHELOR hopeful Liz Duncan suffered one of the less dignified exits of the season in last night’s episode, booted from the show by Matty J without even going through the motions of a rose ceremony.

She may have only lasted five episodes, but she certainly stirred things up while she was there — thanks in no small part to her instant feud with love rival Jennifer Hawke.

On the first night in the house, Hawke overheard Duncan describe her unusually-proportioned dress as ‘putrid’ — and a cascade of champers-fuelled tears ensued.

Speaking to news.com.au, Duncan is sticking to her story: She was talking about the mud on Hawke’s dress, duh.

The dress that caused a really big kerfuffle.

“I wasn’t trying to hide or disguise what I was saying. I had a vision of the Napisan guy coming in and doing an ad about the mud on the bottom of her dress, because there was inches of mud on it. There was no double meaning. There was mud on all of our dresses, we were all in the same boat,” she explained.

So, she actually liked Jennifer’s dress then?

Silence.

“Umm … look, I think somebody needs to be quite confident to wear that dress. I personally wouldn’t wear something like that. It’s white and tight and that’s just not gonna work on this bod. She rocked it and it looked amazing on her.”

These two didn't come here to make friends.

Good save, Liz. Duncan said she did try to talk to Hawke to explain the misunderstanding but “she just wasn’t having a bar of it. She was really mismatched in her reactions, saying ‘I don’t want the drama’ while crying. But I guess once someone’s had that many drinks at that time of the morning they’re probably not talking that much sense.”

Duncan’s final scene with Matty J last night was an excruciatingly familiar scenario for anyone who’s been dumped by someone trying to ‘let them down gently’ with a drawn-out, simpering explanation. Liz said it was just as frustrating as it looked.

‘YES OK I’M DROPPED CAN I GO CRY IN THE CAR NOW’.

“Get it done, get it done! Stop dicking around and get it done. It’s OK, I’m a big girl. Stop dancing around it! I’ll be OK, you’re not God, you’re just a guy,” she laughed.

Despite a brief reality TV stint bookended by drama, Liz said she had thoroughly enjoyed her time on the show — and wished some of her fellow contestants had displayed a little more gratitude.

“I’ve had the best time, and I just wish people would stop devaluing the whole process and stop whining about stuff. Coming out and saying ‘We had to sleep in bunk beds’ and ‘We only got 2/3rds of an avocado’ — it’s just crap. Yeah, we had bunk beds — suck it up. Appreciate the opportunity and be grateful. You’re not going into the Hilton!”

Originally published as Bachelor break-up: ‘You’re not God, stop dicking around’