Kelly Rowland’s super-vivid description of childbirth will make you never want to have kids

‘NIPPLES like frisbees and a bloody battlefield of a vagina’ — Destiny’s Child singer Kelly Rowland’s warts-and-all new pregnancy manual is FULL. ON.

Rowland with the little dude who did a number on her, son Titan. Picture: Julie Kiriacoudis

IF you’re the sort of person who gets a little squeamish thinking about the graphic realities of pregnancy and childbirth, you may want to steer clear of Kelly Rowland’s new motherhood manual.

The Destiny’s Child singer and mother to two-year-old son Titan has just penned a book with the self-explanatory title Whoa, Baby!: A Guide for New Moms Who Feel Overwhelmed and Freaked Out (and Wonder What the #*$& Just Happened).

Between its covers — and in interviews to publicise the book — the Voice Australia coach spares no detail on exactly what havoc pregnancy wreaked on her body. If you’re at all on the fence about having children, we suggest you look away now, lest Rowland’s truth-talk put you off having kids — and indeed, having sex — for life.

Kelly Rowland is not holding back with her description of childbirth. Picture: Jesse Grant/Getty Images

“Your vajayjay does not look the same for a very long time,” she told USA Today, admitting that holding a mirror up to her crotch in the aftermath of the birth had been “the world’s worst idea.”

“When I finally caught a glimpse of the orifice that was causing me so much pain and sorrow, I almost screamed out loud. That bloody battlefield was my vagina? Was I going to look like that forever? Would [husband] Tim [Witherspoon] ever want to come near that nasty scene again?” she writes in the book.

“But, I care about it. We go to get it all done up and trimmed and waxed and this and that and it’s all swollen and crazy and you’re just wondering, what just happened?”

Heading north of the equator, Rowland says her surgically-assisted breasts — she had breast implants eight years ago, at 28 — also radically changed.

The star midway through her 2014 pregnancy. Picture: Bauer-Griffin/GC Images

“All that gnawing at your nipples will take its toll! In those early days, I was fascinated (my polite way of saying ‘horrified’) by the transformation of the boobs,” she writes in the book.

“My nipples were HUGE — we are talking the size of Frisbees — and sometimes I could see these veins bulging out while I was nursing,” she continues. “My boobs themselves were so long and stretchy that I sometimes felt like I could’ve swung them over my shoulders.”

“Even with the silicone action, it was like some of the air had been sucked out and they just sort of hung there like flapjacks.”

The super-fit star missed her toned tummy most of all, and saw reminders of her hard-earned abs everywhere.

“I just saw a cover that I did for Shape and then I’m looking in the mirror going, ‘Oh, my god this is not the same body. How did this happen?’ And, I had to just keep reminding myself that, ‘You had a baby, Kel.’ But I was hard on myself. I really was.”

Titan, when you’re old enough to read you can discover that having you gave your mum ‘nipples the size of Frisbees. Picture: Julie Kiriacoudis

Rowland’s biggest piece of advice for new mums: Let your body recover after childbirth and don’t put unrealistic expectations on yourself — or your nether regions.

“Put away the selfie stick. Do not look in that region when you’ve just come home from the hospital, and definitely don’t capture the image on your cell phone for posterity. Just leave your vagina alone!”

Words to live by.

Originally published as Kelly Rowland’s super-vivid description of childbirth will make you never want to have kids