If Ben and Jen can’t make it work with 17 bathrooms all hope is lost

Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez marriage has become the talk of the town but there’s a worrying detail that needs to be discussed immediately.

OPINION

If Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez can’t make it work in a house with 17 bathrooms, none of us can.

Ben and Jennifer are plagued with break-up rumours, and it is reported that Ben, who has a resting, grumpy man face, is living separately.

Things might not be going well, but the couple owns an $86 million Hollywood mansion. It has four kitchens, 17 bathrooms, and 10 bedrooms.

You can’t say the couple didn’t have space.

They share a home that has 17 bathrooms. Picture: Instagram/JenniferLopez

Remember when Jen shared this photo of Ben? Iconic. Picture: Instagram/JenniferLopez

We’ve all heard the theory that separate bathrooms can make or break a marriage. Sometimes, the bare minimum of privacy can be the secret to romance.

Psychologist Carly Dober said the theory is accurate and not just one of those things someone preaches after three glasses of wine at a girl’s night.

She stressed that everyone is “different” but said that some couples can benefit from separate bathrooms.

“I think if small shifts such as separate bathrooms add to the quality of their relationship then go for it,” she advised.

Well, Jennifer and Ben had 17 toileting options and so much space that they could have housed multiple families, which they do kind of need.

Ben has three kids with his ex-Jennifer Garner, and Jennifer has her teenage twins, which she shares with her ex Marc Anthony.

All that shared space aside – I mean, they don’t even have to share a fridge and be confronted with how your partner thinks it is appropriate to glad-wrap something.

Still things aren’t looking good.

The couple got married in 2022. Picture: Frazer Harrison/Getty Images

Ben is more private then Jen. Picture: Robyn Beck / AFP

At this point, it is hard to know what is true.

Sure, Jennifer attended the Met Gala alone, but she was seen at Ben’s eldest daughter Violet’s graduation party as recently as this week, so who knows?

The two haven’t commented on the break-up rumours, which is sort of typical. They are A-listers, not people on TikTok who insist on making videos about their boring days. However, they also haven’t denied the reports that Ben has flown the coop.

So what is going on? Someone call Tracy Grimshaw; she’d get to the bottom of this with a fast-paced cameraman at her side.

It’ll be depressing if they break up.

The great Ben and Jennifer love story is one for the history books — or, if you’re Jennifer Lopez, one for your documentary The Greatest Love Story Never Told.

It is a must-watch; Jennifer prepares for her new album while waxing lyrical about Ben, and Ben wanders around looking uncomfortable and confused.

At one point, Jennifer shows a bunch of random musicians private love letters that Ben sent her to inspire them. Ben looks perplexed.

He likely made the mistake of thinking that just because he addressed them to Jennifer, they were private.

He needs to grow up and face the fact that he married a diva who will milk her personal life for a sick dance track that people can dance to.

The couple also dated years ago. Picture: Kevin Winter/Getty Images

Anyway, we all know the story: they got together in 2002, got engaged, called off the wedding in 2004, and rekindled their romance in 2021, right after Ben had given some very flattering quotes about Jennifer for an Instyle profile.

“She remains, to this day, the hardest-working person I’ve come across in this business. She has great talent, but she has also worked very hard for her success, and I’m so happy for her that she seems, at long last, to be getting the credit she deserves,” he said.

Naturally, they were back together by the end of the year and married in 2022. I mean, how could she refuse? He called her a great talent.

All of this is to say, if Ben and Jennifer end up announcing they’ve broken up, well, the greatest love story never told, that has never been much told, might not be that great of a romance at all!

If you can’t stay together, even when you’re not sharing a bathroom. Well, how in love were you really?

Originally published as If Ben and Jen can’t make it work with 17 bathrooms all hope is lost