‘Enough is enough’: Aussies fight back against ‘humiliating’ workplace tactic

An Aussie woman has revealed the shocking insults she was subjected to in the workplace by an “abusive” former boss.

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When I was a child, I used to catch buses to school on my own in China.

One day, a man stared at me, and when I asked why, people around me began to laugh.

Their reaction didn’t surprise me, as it seemed nobody cared unless something serious happened.

Another guy chimed in, saying it was because I looked nice, which only fuelled more laughter.

I felt embarrassed and uncomfortable, but sadly, it was something I had come to expect as a child. People often dismissed such incidents as trivial, especially for someone my age.

Later, during my university years in Australia, while working as a casual employee in the hospitality industry, I encountered another uncomfortable situation.

Co-workers would touch me on the shoulder and back, which I believed was a cultural norm, particularly in the Western setting of the local restaurant and bar where I worked.

My female colleagues didn’t seem bothered by it, so I chose to remain silent, despite my discomfort.

After graduating, I landed my first corporate job in a top company, hoping for a more professional environment. However, I soon realised I was wrong.

Sexual harassment became a distressing reality as former managers in different departments targeted me.

One manager consistently touched my bottom and publicly referred to me as a “fat bum”, engaging in abusive and inappropriate behaviour. She was known for harassing male and female subordinates and making lewd jokes.

According to Personal Safety Survey (PSS) data collected by the ABS, an estimated 5 million women (53 per cent) and 2.2 million men (25 per cent) aged 18 years and over have experienced at least one incident of sexual harassment in their lifetime. Picture: iStock

Another senior manager in the same company – an old guy, who was the head of the department, also attempted something inappropriate. I politely rejected him, but then he said I couldn’t fit in the team and started attacking me with all sorts of typical made-up cases, such as poor work performance.

I eventually approached an HR consultant at work, expecting support in dealing with the issue. However, he brushed off my concerns, insisting that was just normal feedback.

This response further worsened my distress, making me realise the immense power managers wielded over an employee’s experience in the workplace.

I felt abandoned and without any support from the company, leading to traumatic experiences. It seemed the company protected its own, leaving victims like me without recourse. Soon, I accepted an offer from another firm and stayed away from that company. 

Sadly, sexual harassment – unwelcome sexual behaviour that’s offensive, humiliating or intimidating – is all too common.

According to Personal Safety Survey (PSS) data collected by the ABS, an estimated 5 million women (53 per cent) and 2.2 million men (25 per cent) aged 18 years and over have experienced at least one incident of sexual harassment in their lifetime.

But finding support can be difficult.

“I’ve found that the amount of support provided by HR practitioners to the people who are involved in a complaint process can vary significantly depending on the experience of the HR person and their ability to manage their own objectivity and bias,” Susan Sadler, the founder of Red Wagon Workplace Solutions, explained.

From my personal experiences, I’ve noticed instances where HR and managers have manipulated situations, including discrediting victims by accusing them of lying or attributing poor performance to them.

In the past, I had hoped for someone who would speak up on these “white lies” that often go unnoticed.

Ms Sadler agreed, and said, “I’ve often seen HR struggle to find a balance between supporting the complainant or victim blaming, rather than an ability to remain impartial and look after the wellbeing of both the complainant and the respondent”.

“Their position can often be more difficult as they manage pressure from decision-makers and sometimes internal politics,” she continued.

Angie Cui is urging Aussie workers to stand up to sexual harassment.

“The best method is for the investigator, HR and decision makers to have a good awareness of their own biases and triggers that might creep into a process to impact objectivity. That self-reflection will enable them to be impartial and therefore approach the process with fairness and compassion for everyone involved, from the complainant to the respondent, and the witnesses.”

It’s something no one likes to talk about it. It’s just an abuse of power, and victims often take many years to speak out.

But nowadays, in the wake of the #MeToo movement, there have been many successful stories.

However, Australia still has a long way to go to achieve the full benefit from this movement due to federal sex discrimination and defamation laws.

I believe that enough is enough. Such inappropriate behaviour must come to an end.

Thankfully, I have now reached a better and healthier place in my life, having learned valuable lessons, and moved on.

But I know I am not the only one who has experienced such harassment, and unfortunately, I won’t be the last.

My hope is that more people will find the courage to stand up and speak out.

Angie Cui is a freelance writer | @angiecuiwrites

Originally published as ‘Enough is enough’: Aussies fight back against ‘humiliating’ workplace tactic