Business is no bed of roses, especially with an ex-girlfriend

WANTING to get into business with your ex-girlfriend — in the hope of winning her back — is not a sound path to success, writes Barefoot Investor.

Be wary about mixing business and romance.

WANTING to get into business with your ex-girlfriend — in the hope of winning her back — is not a sound path to success.

DAN WRITES: My ex-girlfriend and I have long had a dream to open a business together. I have been offered the chance to do so and would like to include her in the deal. I am very confident the business will be successful. The idea is that she would get a job out of it and we could split the profits 50/50. My other motivation is that it would draw us closer, though she offers no guarantees on this. Do you think this could work on a purely business level?

BAREFOOT REPLIES: Men are known to do some crazy things for love, but cobber, this is taking it to a whole other level. Look, I can count on one hand the number of business partnerships that have lasted over a decade — and you want to get into business with your ex-girlfriend ... in the hope of winning her back? If you want romance, try roses. But if you get into business with her the only guarantee I can give you is that you’ll end up getting hurt. Don’t do it.

FLAT OUT

KRIS WRITES: I made the mistake of buying my first home, a one-bedroom apartment, just before an oversupply of one-bedroom units was built in the same area. It has actually dropped about $40,000 in value over four years and now I have outgrown it! Once my partner and I have finished saving a deposit for our next place, I am not sure what I should do with this one. It seems likely to hold me back whether I sell it or rent it. What should I do?

BAREFOOT REPLIES: What you’ve described shows exactly why I don’t recommend buying an investment property before buying your own place. In all the years I’ve been doing this job, I’ve never seen it work out well. Now, I can’t comment on your specific apartment’s prospects for the future, or how long you’ll have to keep it to break even. All I can do is help you frame the right question: would you buy the apartment again today? Then, own your decision.

 

GOING IT ALONE

KAREN WRITES: I am about to hand over all my cash to a financial firm that is going to charge me 1 per cent in fees plus an additional 6 per cent, which will go to an external fund manager. I am EXTREMELY nervous about this as, at the ripe old age of 51, I am a recently divorced single mother with two children, looking for a job after 15 years as a stay-at-home mum. I have $28,000 in super and that is it for my retirement. Please give me some brutal advice.

BAREFOOT REPLIES: I’d argue that your financial planner is already giving you some pretty brutal advice! In the past I’ve helped women who have left long-term relationships without ever having had to handle money before (their partners managed it all). It can be really intimidating for them, because their self-confidence has been knocked about. I love helping women in this situation. Why? Because they listen, they learn, and they generally go on to become awesome money managers. And in the process their self-confidence soars. I’ve sent you a copy of my book, which will take you through the process of making sure you’re financially safe, step by step.

KEEP IT SEPARATE

EMMA WRITES: My boyfriend and I have a shared account for rent, electricity, food, etc, but separate accounts for savings. I am hesitant to go “all in” on the shared accounts as I have a debt from before we met and feel it would be unfair to expect him to pay that as well. Also, I don’t like feeling obliged to ask permission if I want to buy something for myself. Do you have any advice?

BAREFOOT REPLIES: Until he (or you) puts a ring on it, I’d keep everything separate. You’re basically just roommates with benefits. After you commit (or have a kid), that’s when “yours” becomes “ours”.

HORSE TO WATER

HEIDI WRITES: I bought my dad your book for Christmas but I’m worried he won’t read it. He’s 63 and feels like it’s too late to make any financial changes. He’s been bankrupt twice and his attitude towards money still isn’t that responsible. Any advice on how I can get him to read it?

BAREFOOT REPLIES: No, I don’t. If he truly believes it’s too late for him to change anything, he’ll go out of his way to prove himself right. It’s not too late for you, though. Given your dad isn’t going to read my book, I want you to read it. The central theme in my book is a simple one: you have the power to change your financial circumstances, regardless of your current age, your current income, or your current circumstances. Most people totally over-estimate what they can do in one year, and totally underestimate the mountains they can move in six years. The best way you can help your dad is to lead by example. If nothing else, he’ll be really proud of you.

GETTING AHEAD

RHONDA WRITES: I am 61 and for years worked part time to raise two boys and support my husband’s career. Then he divorced me — traded in for a younger model. Around that time, through reading your columns, I started “going Barefoot”. I picked myself up, dusted myself off and returned to fulltime work. I have cleared my credit card debt of $13,000. I pay more into my mortgage each month, and renegotiate every 12-18 months to get a better rate. I now owe $160,000 on a house worth well over $1 million, and I have $50,000 in an offset account. I own my own car, though it is 14 years old. Thank you so much for putting me on the financial straight and narrow.

BAREFOOT REPLIES: Thanks for the kind words, Rhonda. I’ve included your letter because (a) my mother reads this column and it will make her happy, and (b) right now there are thousands of people reading this who might be in a similar situation to where you were a few years ago. Reading how you’ve picked yourself up may just be the pick-me-up they need. You’ve got this!

 

barefootinvestor.com

The Barefoot Investor holds an Australian Financial Services Licence (302081). This is general advice only. It should not replace individual, independent, personal financial advice

Originally published as Business is no bed of roses, especially with an ex-girlfriend