Opinion: Alan Stockdale wants to ‘protect’ men from female Liberal leadership, because there’s nothing like a nasty woman, right?

Baldwin: Alan Stockdale wants to ‘protect’ men from Ley’s and McKenzie’s leadership in the LNP. Assertive women are just so hard to deal with, aren’t they?

Nobody likes a nasty woman. Nobody wants to deal with her, do business with her, or have a drink with her after work.

Nasty women are loud, and who wants a loud woman? They have opinions, thoughts, convictions. All those boring manly traits.

Nasty women are not nice, they’re too disruptive. When they stand up in parliament or take the lead in a team meeting, they’re being too assertive.

Women should not be assertive. When a woman tries to assert, what she is really saying is: Bow down, males, and kiss my feet. Welcome to my matriarchy.

When Sussan Ley and Bridget McKenzie take the reins in Liberals meetings, did you know men are actually being silenced, threatened?

When Sussan Ley and Bridget McKenzie take the reins in Liberals meetings, did you know men are actually being silenced, threatened? Picture: NewsWire / Martin Ollman

It’s definitely not the Liberal Party attempting to step into the 21st century by promoting senior women into leadership roles. It’s all about total female domination.

Can’t have a woman at the helm, because how are the men going to get their voices heard? No, it would never do. Nasty women, hey? Nothing like ‘em.

Nasty men, though. Oh my, they’re powerful. When they take the lead at work, they’re stepping into their divine masculine energy. It’s incredible, isn’t it? Something to behold.

They’re there to make sure all the men get heard. Because nobody, ever, in the history of politics, has ever prioritised men’s voices. Especially not at the expense of others.

That’s what Alan Stockdale, former Victorian treasurer and former federal Liberal Party president, probably meant when he said men need protection from Liberal female leadership.

That’s what he likely meant when he criticised female assertiveness. He was just standing up for the blokes! He was doing what nobody has ever done before.

That’s what Alan Stockdale, former Victorian treasurer and former federal Liberal Party president, probably meant when he said men need protection from Liberal female leadership. Picture: AAP

It doesn’t matter that Pew Research has shown the same qualities praised in male politicians - assertiveness, intelligence, and ambition - make female politicians ‘unlikable’.

It also is irrelevant that the notion of ‘likeability’ is an absolute necessity for women in politics, while it’s a bonus for men. Who cares? If she’s nasty, she’s a threat.

The empirical research is immaterial. Women must be ‘likeable’ to get elected, if they are not assertive or ambitious then they aren’t taken seriously, yet if they do come across as strong and intelligent then they become ‘unlikable’.

Yawn, right? What a silly little research-backed paradox. Anyway, assertive women in public life are probably just a fad. It’ll blow over.

(This is satire. Keep asserting, ladies.)

Grace Baldwin is a Herald Sun columnist

Originally published as Opinion: Alan Stockdale wants to ‘protect’ men from female Liberal leadership, because there’s nothing like a nasty woman, right?