Maleny woman Gemma Kirby, 32, on hair loss and baldness from PTSD

A young singer with a full head of beautiful long, blonde hair says losing more than 75 per cent of it in clumps and experiencing baldness left her feeling alone, ashamed and even questioning her femininity. SEE THE VIDEO

A young singer with a full head of beautiful long, blonde hair says losing it in clumps and experiencing baldness – from PTSD after her toddler was mauled by a dog – left her feeling alone ashamed, and questioning her femininity.

Maleny woman Gemma Kirby, 32, has been struggling with premature hair loss and balding for the past two years – after her son was mauled by a dog.

Ms Kirby started to notice massive clumps of her blonde hair falling out as she dealt with debilitating stress and post traumatic stress disorder.

She was hospitalised on multiple occasions.

The performer was 30 at the time and said the shock, embarrassment, and shame impacted her work, social, and private life in many ways.

“My hair was a huge part of my identity and when all of a sudden I developed bald patches I just wanted to hide away,” Ms Kirby said.

“I avoided socialising and going out in public.

“I remember crying in the shower but feeling too ashamed to even tell my husband at the time.

“I didn’t want him to see me like that or think I wasn’t beautiful. Even though he’s always been nothing but supportive and wonderful.”

Despite having confidence from being on the stage performing since she was just 13, Ms Kirby’s self esteem took a serious hit.

“The change in my appearance destroyed my confidence on stage,” she said.

“I have tried hair extensions to cover up the bald spots but it doesn’t always work as there’s not a lot to attach them to so now I mostly just have to wear my hair up.”

Maleny woman Gemma Kirby before losing her hair. Picture – contributed.

Ms Kirby is not alone as one in two women experience hair loss at some point in their lives, particularly women in perimenopause, with a gradual thinning at the part line or at the crown of the head, often the early signs.

“It’s just something no one talks about,” Ms Kirby said.

“As women we don’t even think of the possibility of losing our hair.

“It was never on my radar that hair loss could happen from stress. It was honestly alarming.

“When it first started it was horrendous. I couldn’t understand what was happening. I had so much shame.”

Eventually Ms Kirby told her husband, a loving man with a cabinet making business, who has held her hand throughout the journey as she sought help and treatment.

“In July 2022 my son was mauled by a dog in a farming accident. The bites were to his face and head,” she said.

“He’s now recovered okay but it was traumatic. He was lucky to have no vision impairment.

“As a parent learning I wasn’t able to always keep him safe was really hard and triggering. It brought up some repressed childhood memories and trauma for me too.”

Two years on and Ms Kirby now believes hair loss and balding is nothing to be ashamed of.

“It’s just a visible symptom of trauma,” she said.

“People can be really cruel about hair loss too. I had lots of extensions in my hair and people would always tell me in public they could see them. Yes well that’s because I have bald patches.

“As women your hair is what makes you feel feminine. I lost about 75 per cent of my hair.”

Maleny woman Gemma Kirby, 32, on hair loss and baldness from PTSD. Picture – contributed.

Reflecting on her experience, Ms Kirby said she thinks a lot of her shame came from the unrealistic beauty standards for women, made worse by the oversaturation of social media.

“No one’s hair you see on social media or in magazines is real,” she said.

“They’re all wearing wigs and have extensions in.

“You can’t heat style and dye your hair like that all the time and have it be so thick and healthy. It’s not normal or real.

“We’re all beautiful the way we are. We’re just real women in real life.

“I want women to they know they’re not broken or alone because they’re losing their hair.”

Working with her hairdresser of nine years, Ms Kirby has been using a new treatment.

ASCE Exosomes stimulates hair follicle to encourage growth, restore pigment and improve texture and works by entering the upper dermal layer through tiny holes created through microneedling and acting as a messenger between the cells.

Dr Scott Allison of Ascension Cosmetic Medicine, Brisbane, is one of the first doctors in Australia to offer InMode’s exosome treatment for hair loss and skin rejuvenation.

Just last week after regrowing her hair from the treatment, Ms Kirby was finally able to have it dyed.

It was also long enough to have extensions put back in again.

Gemma Kirby at the hairdressers last week. Picture – contributed.

“My hairdresser and I were both so happy and emotional … we both cried,” she said.

The brave mother said she doesn’t even have photos of her hair at its worst because she was so embarrassed.

“At one point I had more than 60 hair extensions in,” Ms Kirby said.

“I want to show women it’s important to be authentic and brave. I want them to know balding doesn’t just happen in your 50s and 60s and older. It can and does happen in your 20s and 30s.

“It’s not a journey you have to go through alone. There is help out there.

“If you’re feeling shame please ask for help. Talk to someone.”

Originally published as Maleny woman Gemma Kirby, 32, on hair loss and baldness from PTSD