Sydney author Kathy Lette on why her post-menopause life is brilliant

Popular Sydney author Kathy Lette has revealed why everything — including sex — is fabulous in her 60s.

There was a moment, just for a minute, when the wisecracking and fiercely-feminist author Kathy Lette, lost her confidence. And it was about the subject of her book.

Lette has spent her whole life mining her experiences to make works of fiction. It started when she was just 17 and turned the sexist experience of being a “surfie chick” in the Sutherland Shire into the now Australian classic, Puberty Blues. For her next 18 books, inspired by her own life, she’s taken on the subjects of marriage, motherhood and plastic surgery.

But when she was dumped by her publisher for daring to write her 20th book — about a group of post-menopausal women who weren’t just sitting at home “knitting their own bus pass” but instead plotting revenge on the bosses who had scorned them — she thought perhaps it might be the end of her career.

“I did think maybe I’ve passed my amuse-by date. And I did feel really, really defeated,” she says as we sit down to lunch at Potts Point’s Bistro Rex.

“Because women my age are invisible.”

Kathy Lette at Potts Point’s Bistro Rex. Picture: Richard Dobson

However at 66, Lette is far from invisible. In fact, she’s in vibrant colour. She literally turns heads when she walks into the restaurant for our lunch, and it’s not just because she’s a regular. The author has had over a million copies of her work published, she’s performed one-woman stand up shows and recently delivered an address on feminism to the Press Club in Canberra.

With her now grown-up children to ex-husband, Human Rights lawyer Geoffrey Robertson, living in the UK, Lette bases nine months of her life there and at the time of this interview is days away from returning.

Kathy with Kylie and Dannii Minogue, Stephen Fry and Billy Connolly at a party in London.

Her London life is the stuff of legend. She calls her residence the “unofficial Australian embassy” and along with partner Brian O’Doherty, hosts dinner and dancing parties with everyone from Tim Minchin, to Julia Gillard to Kylie and Dannii Minogue.

“I think the world is so discombobulating and scary right now, so I think we need to find fun and joy and frivolity wherever we can. And I am good at that. I am good at finding the funny,” she says.

Despite being a fierce Republican (the Malcolm Turnbull kind, not the Donald Trump kind), she’s friends with King Charles for goodness sake. So if she was living a fabulous life, other women were too. And wouldn’t they want to read about it?

Kathy Lette and her son Julius Robertson.

The author with her daughter Georgie Robinson

With a new publisher she recently released that 20th book, The Revenge Club. And wouldn’t you know, in an act of ultimate revenge, it’s become a bestseller. It’s no wonder she believes that the stage of life she’s in now is her best.

“There is so much to look forward to. All you hear about menopause is the doom and gloom. Once you get through that, you know, the hot sweats and the brain fog, there are no period cramps, no pregnancy scares. You’ve got all that tampon money to spend. Woo-hoo! You care less what everybody thinks. It’s brilliant,” she says, as she enjoys mahi mahi with celeriac puree, and I the steak frites.

Another thing to look forward to which certainly isn’t advertised? Great sex.

“I do think you come into your sexual prime. Because good sex is about what? It’s about being relaxed in your skin. And it’s not until you reach this age that you know yourself so well. I mean, I can’t even believe I’m vertical right now. I only stopped getting horizontal for you.”

King Charles and Kathy Lette at Clarence House. Picture: Tim P. Whitby - WPA Pool/Getty Images

Since the publication of her first book, Lette has been a loud champion of women. But as her latest experience proves, it hasn’t been easy. She says the harsh and cruel initiation by the surfie boys in her teens prepared her for the sudden spotlight that came when Puberty Blues was published. Back then, her mother received abusive calls from anonymous people calling Lette a slut. Then after meeting Robertson and basing herself in the UK, the press and society weren’t much kinder.

“In the beginning, the English would be very condescending to me,” she says, explaining that at the time, Robertson had been dating culinary queen Nigella Lawson.

“All the gossip columns were like, how could a good-looking, gorgeous, handsome QC break up with a beautiful, gorgeous domestic goddess for a loudmouthed nymphomaniac? In fact, at a party once, this literary guy said something about someone being condescending. He turned to me and said, ‘Condescending, it means talking down to.’ I was like, ‘How am I going to survive here?’ But then I remembered what Eleanor Roosevelt said, that no one can make you feel inferior unless you let them. So I just carried on being myself. Being irreverent, mischievous and rascally and feminist and funny.”

Kylie Minogue and Kathy Lette.

In the end, Lette earned their respect. Including Lawson, of whom Lette says “I am friends with Nigella now, by the way.”

Lette says the backbone of her thick skin is her fiercely feminist mother, who is now 93, and her three sisters, who act like both her support bra (lift each other up) and big girl pants (cover your backside.)

“All my books promote female friendship and the importance of it, because the only thing that gets you through the darker days is having this wonderful laughter at night with your female friend,” she says.

Lette believes, “if I have any gift as a writer, it’s putting forward what women might be thinking but might not be saying out loud.“

It’s why, when becoming a mother to son Julius and then Georgina, she wrote Mad Cow, a book that took the myth that motherhood was the ultimate fulfilment for a female and, she says, “whacked it on the barbecue.”

Kathy Lette with Prince Harry.

Kathy Lette with Barry Humphries.

Looking back, Lette believes becoming a mother was the “hardest time in my life.” Especially as her son was diagnosed with autism.

“I was in England with no family, it was really tricky. But Julius has taught me so much, and he’s made me more compassionate and less judgmental,” she says.

Yet, it’s her ability to juggle being a mother and have a career that she’s most proud of.

 “My kids are fabulous. And they haven’t put themselves up for adoption. You know, and I’ve managed to have a career. I guess I’m proud of that.”

The Sunday Telegraph journalist Karlie Rutherford with author Kathy Lette at Bistro Rex. Picture: Richard Dobson

So does Lette ever stop and think about how a teenager from the Shire grew up to become an international best-selling author, who counts the Royals as friends?

“It’s kind of crazy, isn’t it? Well, first of all, my top tip in life, never turn down an adventure,” she says.

“But honestly. I don’t think about it because I’m still the girl from The Shire. I swim at Cronulla, I walk the Honeymoon Stairs, I dance in The Vinyl Room. Two of my sisters live there. My mum still lives in the Puberty Blues house. And when I’m staying there sometimes, I’ll be in my bedroom where we’ve still got the Kate Bush posters. And at about two in the morning, I’ll wake up and think of climbing out the window to go meet the boys. And then I go, ‘Oh, wake up when you’re 66 years old’.”

Kathy Lette with son Julius and daughter Georgina.

Lette’s life would make for a great autobiography one day. The late Barry Humphries even suggested she call it “Lette Bygones.” But for now, she’s more than happy mining the rich hinterland of her best chapter yet.

“(Women my age) We’ve had marriages, divorces, breakups, affairs, heartaches, the promotions, the betrayals. We’ve raised the children, we’ve gone through all their dramas,” she says.

“We have so much to talk about and write about. Why wouldn’t I want to write about all of that?”

Originally published as Sydney author Kathy Lette on why her post-menopause life is brilliant