Non-binary, queer and proud: Nadia shares how they found their identity

After being stifled in a Christian environment in the early 2000s, one inspiring person is asking the world to just do one thing – be kind.

Nadia Brady, Thursday, February 3, 2022. Picture: Kevin Farmer

Sexual orientation and gender identity aren’t choices that are made, but are feelings that have been ignored for far too long and now, one Toowoomba non-binary person has opened up to share their very inspiring story about faith, identity and the importance of always practising kindness.

From a young age Nadia Brady realised their sexual preference and identity was different to some of their peers, when the girls at school started talking about boys and they couldn’t relate.

When girls and boys started to divide into separate gender groups, this confusion only intensified further, as they felt they didn’t belong in either category, presenting many challenges for them at school.

Nadia, who is now aged 33, identifies as a queer, non-binary person and uses they/them pronouns.

BE KIND: Toowoomba’s Nadia Brady identifies as a queer, non-binary person and has shared her powerful story. Picture: Kevin Farmer

Raised in a Catholic household, Nadia attended multiple Catholic schools from kindergarten to Year 12.

“It started to become difficult for me, even before I knew I was queer, but people would make gay jokes all the time and I became a lot less tolerant of that,” Nadia said.

“From around Year 6 or 7, I was bullied a lot for being a lesbian and became severely depressed, so that really made my whole late primary and high school experience quite difficult.”

With the support of their parents, Nadia changed schools and found a supportive friendship circle, but continued to struggle with the lack of acceptance from others.

Keen to launch a social justice and anti-discrimination program, Nadia said their ideas were rejected by many adults, who felt it wasn’t appropriate action for a Christian or Catholic.

Things escalated when Nadia took a heterosexual, female friend as their partner to their school formal, which resulted in a barrage of taunts from their peers.

“It was quite stifling and I think that was the best you could have hoped for in a Christian environment, in the early 2000s,” Nadia said.

“A few of my family members are gay and I noticed they were being treated differently too – homophobia was a lot more accepted back then.”

BE KIND: Toowoomba’s Nadia Brady identifies as a queer, non-binary person and has shared her powerful story. Picture: Kevin Farmer

Nadia said the judgmental response they faced from others was very damaging and weighs heavily on their confidence, self-esteem and mental health to this day.

“I can’t imagine what it would have been like if I didn’t have such a supportive family and it was even worse in the generations before mine,” Nadia said.

“We’ve made so much progress over the years and generally what’s happening in Christian schools today makes me feel quite hopeful.

“I hope any kid living in Toowoomba, Queensland or Australia, are living in a safer and more affirming world now.”

BE KIND: Toowoomba’s Nadia Brady identifies as a queer, non-binary person and has shared her powerful story. Picture: Kevin Farmer

While Nadia still considers themself a Christian, they said they no longer attend church but always practice being kind to others.

“The thing I find really challenging about Christianity is I was raised to believe it’s about showing kindness and every person deserving love and compassion,” they said.

“To then at times be shown real injustice … those people don’t necessarily sit with my personal belief of what a good Christian is and Jesus hung out with people who were marginalised or a bit different.

“People don’t choose if they’re gay, straight, lesbian or trans – it’s just who they are.”