'I can't believe there's so many of you out there biting your kids'

"Today I took him to playgroup and there were three victims," Adelaide mum Matilda said when asking for toddler biting advice - not emotionally prepared for the answers she received.

Image: TikTok/Matilda Norton

Adelaide mum Matilda Norton reached out to other parents via TikTok recently, seeking advice about her one-year-old's biting phase.

"There's gotta be another mum on here that can help me out," she begins, talking to the camera and holding her (adorable) toddler.

"Banks bites, and he bites people, kids. It is bad. 

"Today I took him to playgroup and there were three victims. He's bitten probably like five kids by now, and I don't know how to stop it.

"I always have to be on high alert with him. I've Googled, and I'm not going to bite him back, I don't think that will work. If anyone has any advice, please help me."

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"We bit him back and hard. It cured him"

Matilda's clip has now been viewed half a million times, with many commenters advising her to use a very old-school tactic.

"I had a biter! We bit him back and hard. It cured him," read one suggestion, and it was repeated multiple times.

"My mum swears by the bite back method. I hate the idea but she said she did it once when we were kids and it never happened again," added a second.

A third shared, "I bit my son back, and said a firm NO, he never bit again."

People were adamant that the 'technique' worked.

"To be honest the bite back worked well. I tried all the other options but we resorted to this and it worked within two weeks," one mum promised, while another shared, "I like how you don’t think bite back method would work but you haven’t tried it. Give it a go."

Finally, there was this parent who swears she lived to tell the tale: "It seems wrong but the bite back method never fails lol. I was a biter as a child and one day my dad bit me back hard. Never did it again."

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"Don't bite back. Ever"

Not everyone agreed with the bite back method.

"My daughter was a biter and a few mums suggested biting back.... I didn't do it because you can't judge how hard!" one said.

An Early Childhood Educator wrote, "Biting is a completely normal stage. It is a form of communication so try to understand what he is trying to say."

Others suggested Banks could benefit from a dummy, or, as one, said, "Redirection is the key."

That suggestion was backed up by Melbourne paediatrician Dr Trupti Prasad, who told Kidspot specifically and in no uncertain terms about this video:

"Biting back is never the answer- it doesn't address the root of the problem which is that the child is likely expressing anger or frustration."

What should parents do instead?

"Set boundaries, including physical ones, by closely supervising a child who is going through a biting phase, removing them from a difficult situation and if biting occurs, firmly telling then 'no biting, it hurts'.

"Demonstrate empathy to the person who has been bitten. Help your child learn the language to express themselves when frustrated, and model this for them explicitly."

In a follow up video, Matilda shares that she will be trying a distraction technique when Banks seems like he's frustrated, before his emotions escalate.

"I can't believe there's so many of you out there biting your kids," she added.

For more information on children biting, see the Raising Children Network, or speak to your family's health professional.

This article was published in May and was updated in August 2024. 

Originally published as 'I can't believe there's so many of you out there biting your kids'