‘I planned my wedding in 3 months and didn’t even hate it’

Would the real bridechilla please stand up 

'Good brows and Botox maketh the bride.' Image; supplied

Newlywed Bella gives us a crash course on how to plan a wedding in 3 months, and it's not for the faint-hearted. 

What is the opposite of a bridezilla? A bridechilla? Because that was me. After nine years and two babies, my now-husband proposed at the end of last year.

We were the last couple in our friendship group to tie the knot, and it was a moment that many of our loved ones thought would never happen. We waited nearly a decade to get hitched because starting a family had always been so much more important to us than wearing fancy clothes and throwing some rings on our fingers. We always wanted our kids to be a part of the day, too.

It also meant a chance to come together and celebrate something joyful with those we love most. Tomorrow is not guaranteed, so we wanted to throw one hell of a party in the name of unholy matrimony.

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So on an unassuming Thursday morning, when my partner popped the question out of the blue, we decided then and there that we’d strike while the iron was hot and get married sooner rather than later. Otherwise, it would be another nine years before we got our act together. After scouting some venues, it turned out that our top pick was available in three months. Yolo, we thought. Let’s do it.

A wedding will take up as much real estate in your life as you give it. And hey, if you want a big bonanza that takes you two years to organise, you do you! But for us, this was about throwing a party with love and fun at the forefront of the entire production. I’m not saying it was easy, but because we had such a tight timeframe, we didn’t overanalyse our choices and made decisions quickly and, most importantly, from the heart.

Here are my top tips for any other whirlwind wedding planners out there…

You really don’t sweat the small things

Planning a whirlwind after nine years and two kids means you make decisions from the heart. For us, it was important to have a small wedding. We wanted to speak to every guest there and not feel guilty about not getting around to saying hello to my mother’s second cousin. With 66 people in attendance, we could have multiple conversations with our favourite people throughout the day and spend quality time with everyone there.

We also didn’t get our knickers in a knot about making sure our kids were preened to perfection. We didn’t bother buying them fancy wedding shoes because, as any parent knows, kids will put whatever they want on their damn feet, and you need to pick your battles. On our wedding day, my three-year-old wanted to wear her Paw Patrol Crocs, and girlfriend slayed the look! It’s one of my favourite memories from the wedding. 

'Don't bother buying them fancy shoes.' Image: supplied

If you can get help, take it

Another whirlwind wedding hack is outsourcing! I’ve watched Father of the Bride enough times to know that we needed to find our Franc, which came in the form of wedding wizard Em from DLT Events. She helped us pull together everything we knew we’d suck at, like a run sheet, on-the-day coordination/fire-putting-out, knowing who the best, most affordable suppliers were, etc. 

Rush orders are your best friend

I was excited to find an off-the-rack wedding dress. With so many Aussie designers now offering ready-to-wear dresses, there's so much choice. But for fun, I thought, let's just do one fancy fitting at a proper wedding dress shop so I can have that special moment trying dresses on with my sister and bestie.

Well, as fate would have it, I fell head–over–heels in love with the first dress I tried on at a bridal boutique. It was The One.

But it was going to need some pretty extensive alterations to fit #shortgalyfe. When I told the assistant how soon my wedding was, she looked at me like I had two heads. Thankfully, their label offers rush orders, so for an extra fee of $220, they pushed the dress through and altered it in time for the big day.

Let your bridal party choose their clothes 

Speaking of dresses, I’ve always found it weird and a bit sister wifey that bridesmaids must dress in uniform. When in any other circumstance would you purposely dress the same as your friends to an event? My bridespeople would have different dresses, so they could wear them again in years to come.

Similarly, I also wanted to empower my daughter and let her pick her outfit for the big day. Like most three-year-olds, she has strong opinions over what she wears, so she needed to love her look and have a say.

I had no particular colour scheme in mind. That was until I took my three–year–old shopping for her flower girl dress, and she picked a gorgeous pastel yellow tutu, which she sweetly said was like a fancy Emma Wiggle dress. From there, her dress informed the colour scheme of everyone else’s.

I sent a photo of my daughter’s dress to my bridesmaids. We pinged around lots of links and ideas until we landed on three stunning and different styles of dresses. They all complimented one another but were different. It turns out three–year–olds have a pretty good eye for style!

Bella's bridpeople! Image: supplied

Figure out what’s important to you and lean into it

Look, I really don’t give a crap about menu designs, party favours, table scaping and signage. We happily skipped time and money on all of the above. The signage is especially a mind–boggling concept. Haven’t people heard of Google Maps to find a wedding venue? And every single person invited to a wedding knows the couple’s names. We don’t need a plastic sign saying who we are. 

All I wanted were epic speeches and an even better dance floor. We had six speakers, including myself and my husband, which I know is a lot; however, every speech was amazing in its own way. We gave each speaker a tight five-minute window so it didn’t drag. I admit that my one bridezilla request was that I get the longest speech slot of 15 minutes. 

The stereotype is that most brides always dream of their wedding dresses. For me, it was always the music and the dancing I envisioned when I thought of my wedding day. I can’t cook or do my tax returns, but I can curate a playlist. I whipped up the ultimate dance floor playlist for our DJ, who downloaded every track so he could mix it live on the night. As a dancefloor–deprived–millennial–mother, it took me right back to my glory days of 2007, and it was the dance floor of my dreams. 

Basic bitch beauty prep for the win (almost)

Between two little kids and work, I didn’t have the time to go down the rabbit hole of ‘wedding skincare prep.’ Facials are time-consuming, risky (more on that in a minute) and expensive AF. I was better off putting my precious pennies towards the two things I knew would work best for me: brows and Botox. Good brows and Botox maketh the bride, in my humble opinion.

I did, however, cave and book a last-minute facial the week of the wedding. I strategically booked it six days out from the big day juuuust in case – but my facialist assured me it was a stock-standard facial with no downtime and no risk of a reaction. Well, guess what? I did have a reaction, and by the day of my wedding, my entire chin was Flake City and literally shedding its skin like a snake. I just had to laugh! If you don’t get regular facials, don’t bother. Thank god for my makeup artist, who fixed it with some sorcery.

Important mantra: divide and conquer the wedmin. Image: supplied

You have to stay on top of your ‘homework’

I’ll admit that not every second of wedding planning was a hoot. Most nights after putting the kids to bed, the last thing we felt like doing was wedmin, but there was no other time to do it. My husband and I worked through a shared google doc of outstanding admin tasks and joked that it was like having homework. Divide and conquer was our mantra.

Even for a small wedding, it was still a lot of work, but by the end of the process, we were so excited to enjoy the fruits of our labour–aka the actual wedding day. All that planning and hard work paid off because it really was one of the best days of our life.

Would I have preferred to have spent a year slowly planning it? Nah. It was an intense three months, but like a kid counting down to Christmas, instead of waiting 365 days, I only had to wait 90.

Originally published as ‘I planned my wedding in 3 months and didn’t even hate it’