This could be the cure for your festive hangover

I VISITED Sydney’s in-demand hangover clinic to see what all the fuss was about. I found, among other things, a blood-spattered wall.

Is this clinic the answer to all your hung-over prayers?

I’M looking at the blood spattered on the wall and I’m trying to work out whether it belongs to me or someone else.

While I’m staring at the scarlet arc, trying to work out whether it did indeed spring from my vein, I am also listening to the dulcet tones of a woman in the room next to me begging for a sick bag in between bouts of dry retching.

I’m not in the emergency ward of a hospital. In fact, people pay up to $400 to be here.

I’m road-testing the hangover.clinic.

Not exactly like a scene from ‘Psycho’ but colourful nonetheless.

Clinics such as this made headlines when they first opened in Sydney late last year, as people weren’t entirely sure how to feel about them. Anyone who had suffered through a debilitating hangover secretly thought “where the hell was this invention when I had my head in the toilet bowl last month,” while other more responsible folk questioned the ethics of an establishment that “normalised” or “enabled” binge drinking.

Been there.

Put simply, the clinic offers to combat the effects of a hangover using intravenous medication. They’ll hydrate you, load you up with vitamins that will (hopefully) restore your zing and can also administer intravenous pain medication and anti nausea drugs if you’re in real trouble.

And what better time to road test the clinic, as this is officially the time of year where most people are at danger of contracting a hangover (“contracting” is better way of terming it, as it sounds like you had nothing to do with the affliction ... The hangover just happened to you).

New research from Amcal shows that Monday, December 19 marked the start of the country’s biggest week of festive frolicking, resulting in what’s anticipated to be the week when the greatest number of sickies are likely to be taken.

In case you become part of this statistic, here’s what you need to know about the hangover.clinic:

HOW DID IT COME ABOUT?

The idea for the hangover.clinic came to Max Petro when he was working as a ski instructor in the US; after a night out on schnapps the ski patrol team would always be fresh the next morning despite the shenanigans of the previous night. Asking how they did it, he was let in on an old ski patrol secret — IV fluids, oxygen, and painkillers to relieve the symptoms of hangovers (which they were able to administer as qualified paramedics).

Max Petro at the hangover.clinic. Picture: Dylan Robinson

That’s when the hangover.clinic was born, with the aim to make IV hydration treatments available to everybody, to relieve the symptoms of hangovers, and other “life hangovers” such as sports dehydration, colds/flus, and jet lag.

WHAT EXACTLY IS ON OFFER?

They have a veritable cocktail of hangover depleting items on the menu. You can inhale oxygen, take litres of intravenous fluids for instant hydration and be loaded up with vitamin C, magnesium, zinc, antioxidants and iron.

Fun fact: they now offer cosmetic injectables as well. So you can get a Botox boost in your forehead while you’re recovering from last night’s session.

WHERE DOES IT HAPPEN?

There’s a clinic in Surry Hills, Sydney, where I went for my treatment. But they also do call-outs, so you can book them to come to your home or even your place of work (some corporates are treating their staff to a treatment the day after a big work function).

WHAT ACTUALLY HAPPENS?

After signing some forms a registered doctor jams a fairly large needle in your vein. There’s no way of prettying this part up. My doctor had a little difficulty with my vein and it sprung a blood leak for a little while. Thankfully I am tough as nails and this didn’t worry me.

Where the magic happens.

The doctor warned that my arm may bruise a bit and joked that the marks would be “something to remember” her by. I still had the bruises on the crook of my arm a week and a half later, so maybe seriously consider whether you want to have a treatment like this before a big event, or before going home for Christmas ... family members may look at the bruises on your arm and think your life has taken a dark turn.

You then move into a group sitting room, or a private room if you are lucky enough to swing it.

Intrepid investigative journalist takes one for the team/gets out of actual work for an hour.

I had the actIV Myers Cocktail which is a mixed bag of vitamins and minerals. You end up sitting there for almost an hour as it drips in. Thankfully there are blankets and you’re in a fairly comfy chair, so you can snooze or read or reconsider the life decisions that brought you to this point while the fluid does its thing.

The doctor also administered a vitamin B12 shot in my butt as something of a grand finale before I left. It was like a clinical high five on the way out.

THE COST

Prices range from about $59.95 for the “quick shot” which is IV hydration and intravenous pain relief. It can get closer to the $400 mark if you want the full array of delights blasted up your arm. They also offer memberships which give you a discount on services if you want to make a habit of it.

THE RESULT

I felt bloody marvellous. I genuinely felt like I could overturn a car with my bare-hands two days after the treatment. The main thing I noticed was that I didn’t have the lethargy that I usually have.

Admittedly I didn’t have a hangover when I went for the treatment, but as the owner Max points out the treatments aren’t just for rascal-y binge drinkers. I can see that these boosters would be beneficial if you’re coming into a period where you want to be your best, for example travelling overseas on holiday, or preparing for a marathon.

LOL. “Preparing for a marathon”.

Originally published as This could be the cure for your festive hangover