Parent and expert share the communication tips to discuss social media ban with children

Tens of thousands of teens are about to lose access to the thing they love the most – so how can you help them handle it?

Brisbane mother Cassandra Eames, 41, is looking forward to a family summer without social media.

“I am excited to see what it will look like — it’s been a long time,” she said.

“I hope it will give us a break and a reset.”

The account manager has a son aged 12 and a daughter aged 15.

Ms Eames has been chatting with her children about social media long before the Albanese government announced its ban for under 16s, due to start on December 10.

“Education is important,” Ms Eames said.

“It’s about teaching kids how to use social media responsibly, how to look out for unsafe things online and understand how algorithms work.

Cassandra Eames with her 15-year-old daughter Rose Veltheim. Picture: Steve Pohlner

“My kids have always grown up with technology and we’ve had open dialogue the whole time.

“So we’ve had open conversations about what you can and cannot access.

“Once social media came into the picture we talked about what is safe online and what to do if something makes you uncomfortable.”

Ms Eames credits this open dialogue with keeping her kids safe.

She said in the past her daughter had received messages that made her feel uncomfortable, but by discussing it with her, the pair were able to review her daughter’s privacy settings and stop the messages.

“To me, open dialogue comes down to the relationship you have with your children,” she said.

“It’s also about picking the right time and making sure your kids are comfortable to open up to you.

Ms Eames said she had been talking to her daughter about social media long before the ban was announced. Picture: Steve Pohlner

“And they know you will listen and respond to them no matter what.”

Ms Eames’ motherly instincts are backed up by clinical research.

Clinical psychologist and Triple P teenage expert Dr Alan Ralph said inquisitive questions, open dialogue and timing can help parents and children navigate the ban together.

Triple P is an international recognised positive parenting program for children from babies to teenagers.

Dr Ralph said the first step was to create a space for genuine conversations.

Dr Alan Ralph is the teen expert for Triple P parenting, a positive parenting program. Picture: Supplied

“Parents must make sure they create an environment where children feel they can come to them with concerns,” he said.

“Open conversation needs to be inviting and create an opportunity for those conversations to occur naturally.”

Dr Ralph said once a conversation about the ban is established, inquisitive questions are best.

“There are a lot of unknowns with the ban,” he said.

“I think the critical thing is for parents to treat conversations as an exercise of finding out.

“It’s an explorative conversation — that’s really important.

“This demonstrates parents are invested in their child and understand what they are about to lose.

“It’s important for parents to validate and acknowledge any frustration and anxiety teenagers may be experiencing.

“And for parents to explore these emotions together and debunk myths.

“Teens themselves are going to be looking for answers themselves.

“So ask questions like ‘What have you found out today?’, ‘What are your friends saying?’, ‘What have you read about the ban?’.

“Conversations that are done in the context of looking for answers are the best.”

Originally published as Parent and expert share the communication tips to discuss social media ban with children