The Oscars will make you do crazy things

Oh what a night. The 94th Academy Awards descended upon us for an evening of glitz, glamour, and violence.

Oh what a night. The 94th Academy Awards descended upon us for an evening of glitz, glamour, and violence.

A few significant firsts: Ariana DeBose is the first queer woman of colour to win Best Supporting Actress, for her role in West Side Story. Troy Kotsur is the first deaf man to win a Best Supporting Actor award for his role in CODA. Billie Eilish became the first Oscar winner who was born in the 21st century. CODA is the first film distributed by a streaming service to win best picture. And, Kourtney is the first Kardashian to attend the Oscars — you just know Kravis brought VMAs elegance to the Oscars red carpet… 

Kourtney Kardashian and Travis Barker attend the 94th Annual Academy Awards. Photo by David Livingston/Getty Images

“Love will make you do crazy things.” 

Will Smith slapped Chris Rock after Rock made a joke about Jada Pinkett Smith's shaved head. She has alopecia! And a net worth of a gazillion dollars. 

Ethics of violence aside, we hope this marks a renaissance of chaotic celebrity behaviour. No more media-safe solemn speeches, we want disorder. Does anyone have the scoop on what P-Diddy’s Myers-Briggs personality type is? I’m thinking INFP, the way he cut through that tension was mediator excellence. 

US actor Will Smith accepts the award for Best Actor in a Leading Role for "King Richard" onstage during the 94th Oscars. Photo by Robyn Beck / AFP

Will Smith won his first Oscar. For his role as Richard Williams in King Richard. He tried to save face with a blubbering speech about wanting to be a vessel for love, that Richard Williams was “a fierce defender of his family,” that he was “overwhelmed by what God is calling on me to do and be in this world.” We salute to his team for working out his speech pivot on such a tight turnaround. 

The musical numbers were sweet. Billie Eilish is the real deal: a sulky, sullen, chic superstar. She and her brother FINNEAS took home The Oscar for Best Original Song, their contribution to the latest James Bond flick,  No Time To Die. 

The Encanto cast's performance of ‘We Don’t Talk About Bruno’ was a surprising slay — Megan Thee Stallion was enlisted for a verse, which she ate. It’s cool to be a Lin Manuel Miranda hater but that performance was so camp and glorious. Also, tick, tick...BOOM! was good, people.

It goes without saying that Beyoncé was perfection. 

Benedict Cumberbatch in The Power of the Dog. Photo Kirsty Griffin/NETFLIX © 2021

New Zealander Jane Campion won Best Director for The Power of the Dog. It’s her second Oscar (she previously won for 1993’s The Piano), and it marks only the third time a woman has taken out the Best Director category. 

The night ended on a lovely note, with Lady Gaga and Liza Minelli presenting the award for Best Film. CODA won. It really was a gorgeous, heartfelt moment. One that was probably overshadowed by the drama of the evening, but hey, CODA won all three of the three awards they were nominated for. That is something worth celebrating.

Cast and crew accept the award for Best Picture for "CODA". Photo by Robyn Beck / AFP

Now to the fashion. Because, what would Hollywood’s night of nights be without the criticism of clothes.

What a refreshing red carpet it was. Much like Prince William and Cathy Cambridge’s recent (slightly problematic) tour of the Caribbean, it was like everyone was dressed by the understudy stylist. 

Which is a welcome change to the usual "straight from the runway" looks. It looked like goblin season in fancy dress.

There were moments of sheer, high glamour thanks to Zoe Kravitz looking as delicious as a bag of fairy floss from the Royal Easter Show in a baby punk Saint Laurent number.

Billie Eilish in a black ruffled Oodie by Gucci.

US singer-songwriter Billie Eilish and brother, US singer-songwriter Finneas O'Connell. Photo by Angela Weiss / AFP

Zendaya was all business up top and a party below in a white button down Valentino shirt and glistening skirt combo.

US actress Zendaya. Photo by Valerie Macon / AFP

Timothée Chalamet went shirtless in custom Louis Vuitton. It was look so achingly French you could hear the accent over his name.

US-French actor Timothee Chalamet on the red carpet. (Photo by Valerie Macon / AFP)

Jada Pinkett Smith made a poor choice in husband but you can’t fault her style decisions. Her emerald green Jean Paul Gaultier Couture stopped traffic. Literally. The ruffled skirt and train was almost a metre long. Completed with a zip up bodice, she’s exactly what one would imagine Ursula would be draped in for a live action The Little Mermaid remake.

Jada Pinkett Smith attends the 94th Annual Academy Awards. Photo by David Livingston/Getty Images

All in all, a great Oscars in terms of fashion. Why? Because everyone looked Logies chic: an attainable chic.