Euro 2016: Iceland teamwork too much for witless England

England stopped being a football team yesterday and instead became a punchline.

England’s coach Roy Hodgson, who resigned immediately after his team’s 2-1 loss to Iceland.

England stopped being a football team yesterday and became a punchline.

Write your own Brexit jokes. Or perhaps you prefer the Iceland puns: ‘Go now Hodgson in the name of Cod.’

Whatever your fancy, this was the night when England were not just “the world’s most disappointing team” as Time magazine dubbed them in 2010 but became a laughing stock and crashed out of Euro 2016.

The theory was that England would do better against stronger nations. The reality was that they did their truly horrendous worst against one of the smallest countries in world football. What a joke, and Iceland deserve the last laugh.

They thoroughly merited this historic victory for showing all the teamwork, the strategy, the intelligence and patience that England so palpably lacked from the moment they conceded an equaliser. This was brain-dead football, full of individuals panicking.

To think this young bunch of players were meant to be fresh, not scarred by the England team’s traumatic past, a skilful bunch to lead us into the future. What was it Greg Dyke, the FA chairman, said? World Champions by 2022?

Well, they will have to resume that journey with their own mental nightmare in their psyche and a new manager. Hodgson was fortunate to survive the World Cup in Brazil two years ago. Now he is gone, having taken a potent bunch of attackers to this tournament and ended up with defender Gary Cahill up front.

There is no shame in losing to Iceland — the Netherlands succumbed home and away in qualifying — but this was awful almost beyond words from the moment that Iceland equalised with exactly the same set piece they had used against Austria in the previous game.

In that one moment alone, when Wayne Rooney was left weakly trying to challenge a big centre half for a key header, we had a million questions for Hodgson about chaotic organisation. He still does not know his best team and now he will never find out.

It is the end of him — perhaps his last game in management. In presiding over this humiliation, Hodgson seemed to abandon the principles upon which he has constructed his entire career.

Hodgson, 68, resigned as manager in the press conference room at Stade de Nice minutes after the 2-1 defeat had brought his third major tournament to a dismal end. Despite building his reputation upon producing well-structured, defensively organised teams, this England side proved careless in defence and shapeless in attack, prompting withering criticism from pundits.

“Roy was making it up as he was going along,” former England captain Alan Shearer said on the BBC.

“It was the worst performance I have seen from an England team. Ever. They were out-thought, out-fought, out-battled. Totally hopeless.”

With his side trailing 2-1 at halftime, Hodgson’s response was to summon the cavalry.

Jack Wilshere, Jamie Vardy and, in the dying stages, teenage Manchester United striker Marcus Rashford entered the fray. England had four strikers on the pitch but still looked completely bereft of ideas.

Yet again at a major tournament, when England needed patience and poise, they seemed to panic.

Iceland defender and goalscorer Ragnar Sigurdsson said: “We didn’t feel that they created any chances. We were just heading away long balls.”

Defensively, things that had seemed better in the group phase fell apart against Iceland. Sigurdsson scored Iceland’s first goal, cancelling out Rooney’s penalty in the sixth minute by charging into the box and volleying home Kari Arnason’s flick-on from Aron Gunnarsson’s long throw-in. Gunnarsson’s mighty throws had been identified as a threat by Hodgson in the build-up, but the ease with which Sigurdsson strolled into the box to score exposed serious defensive shortcomings.

Gary Neville, Hodgson’s assistant, has also stepped down and he, too, found himself in the firing line.

“What on earth is Gary Neville doing?” Shearer asked. “He was one of the best defenders in the world. He will know Iceland’s strength at set pieces, so surely he has been working on defending them all week.”

Confirming that the malaise affected the whole team, the winning goal was the fault of goalkeeper Joe Hart, who could only palm Kolbeinn Sigthorsson’s 18th-minute strike into the net.

“Our players caved tonight,” Shearer added. “They caved and the manager caved.”

Pressed to explain what had happened, Rooney was at a loss. “We knew they were dangerous from set pieces and throw-ins,” he said. “We didn’t deal with that well enough. We prepared and did everything we could and it hasn’t worked for us.”

One desperate scrambled victory over Wales is all England have to show for their time in France and this defeat was so bad as to be famous around the world.

In his resignation statement Hodgson said: “I’m extremely disappointed of course about tonight’s result and ultimately our exit from the competition. We haven’t progressed as far as I thought we were capable of, and that’s obviously not acceptable.

“We are in the results business,” he added. “Now is the time for someone else to oversee the progress of this young, hungry and extremely talented group of players.”

The Football Association announced that it will discuss plans to appoint a successor “imminently”. Whoever succeeds Hodgson will inherit a squad rich in youthful promise, with players like Rashford, Kane, Dele Alli and Eric Dier all still relative newcomers at international level.

Gareth Southgate, the England under-21 manager, tops an underwhelming list for a potential successor, with Crystal Palace manager Alan Pardew and Neville also said to be in the running.

Bournemouth’s young manager Eddie Howe and new Celtic boss Brendan Rodgers could also be in the frame.

The Times/AFP