No Nick Kyrgios, I am not entertained

Nick Kyrgios promises to be a better man, then does it all over again. Pictures: Twitter/AAP/AFP

Great bloke Nick Kyrgios. Good with kids, quick with a joke, all the other players love him. And what a player — booming serve, great around the court, trick shots between the legs. Champion.

The list of excuses for Australia’s leading sports embarrassment is long. But the best of them all — he’s an entertainer.

In the slightly staid world of international tennis, he is the new John McEnroe. Colourful, passionate and larger than life. He makes a tennis match more than a sporting contest — it’s crazy spectacle and we never know where it might end.

Well all I can say is, if what Nick Kyrgios does on court entertains you, I can’t imagine how much fun you are going to have next time you are in the supermarket and someone’s toddler throws a tantrum because mum won’t buy him a lolly.

Is foul-mouthed, spitting abuse of an umpire trying to uphold the rules entertaining?

Is watching while a player goes out the back for a sook and smashes a couple of racquets entertaining?

Personally, my idea of entertainment at a tennis match is something more along the lines of Ash Barty going one set down against Estonian Anett Kontaveit and mustering all her guts and determination to fight back and win it in three, booking a place in the Cincinnati Masters quarter-finals.

Or Alex de Minaur, relatively small in stature and without many of the natural gifts of his foul-mouthed countryman, running all day and making the absolute most of what he has.

Kyrgios has copped a significant fine for his behaviour in Cincinnati and there is still a chance a suspension will be imposed. Fines haven’t worked in the past. He promises to be a better man and then does it all again.

It’s time for a long suspension. Tennis will be far more entertaining without him.

In fact, why doesn’t he go and play basketball, a sport he has previously expressed a preference for. There’s a suburban team in Melbourne looking for someone to take the place of “Phil Inn” now that Brayden Sier has been sprung.