Coco Gauff could win the French Open after playing the worst set of tennis you’ll ever see

The French Open quarter-final was a horror show featuring more than a hundred unforced errors. If the top women players want more marquee match time, they must stop serving up such dross.

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Coco Gauff has a pleasing disposition and praiseworthy manner of releasing the ball from her strings. She’s a decent player benefiting from a spectacularly soft era … and just might end up winning a French Open in which she’s played some of the worst tennis you’ll ever see at this level.

Gauff was one of the female players complaining about men getting all the night-time, showtime, prime-time slots at Roland Garros. Every night for 10 consecutive nights, the blokes were preferred, as they should have been, every day and night of the week, because there’s only one world in which a quick, early-round, three-setter involving Gauff should be preferred to the supreme athleticism and theatrics over five sets of Carlos Alcaraz, Jannik Sinner or Novak Djokovic. That world is a fantasy world.

Coco Gauff hits a backhand against Lois Boisson of France. Picture: Julian Finney/Getty Images

“If they’re going to put one match at 8.15pm, for sure there could be an opportunity to put a woman there,” Gauff said. “I feel like we produce some high-quality tennis and we have some great stars on the women’s side who I’m sure fans would love to see. Same with other places I play, like Australia. A night match there, people are excited to see me. I definitely think there’s opportunity to improve that in the future with this tournament.”

Gauff then made a dill of herself, and her remarks, by producing the worst set of tennis in memory. Gauff’s 6-7 (6-8) 6-4 6-1 quarter-final victory over Madison Keys was a shocker. I literally found it unwatchable. They coughed up 101 unforced errors in a match played in a mostly deserted stadium. The first set was so awful. I gave ’em one more game. The start of the second set was even worse.

There was zero crowd noise, zero atmosphere, like a sparse movie audience shocked at how bad the show had become. In a flurry of hooked backhands, backhands dunked into the net, backhands slogged long, awkward silence, forehands going halfway up the net, one of Gauff’s regulation forehands actually bounced before it even reached the net.

Coco Gauff shakes hands with Madison Keys after their quarter-final match featured 101 unforced errors. Picture: Dimitar Dilkoff/AFP

Twelve of the 15 points ended with the whimper of an unforced error, so I switched it off and put on a re-run of Jack Nicholson in The Shining. Because it was less harrowing viewing. For Gauff to have suggested women’s matches like these should get headline scheduling over Alcaraz, Sinner and G.O.A.T Djokovic … she must have been having a laugh.

Marked out of 10, that set was a zero. No matter! The American improved in her semi-final to wipe Court Philippe-Chatrier 6-1 6-2 with overwhelmed French wildcard Lois Boisson and reach Saturday night’s final (11pm AEST) against Belarusian Aryna Sabalenka, who huffed, puffed and eventually trampled Iga Swiatek 7-6 (7-1) 4-6 6-0.

Funnily enough, in this merry jig between the two highest-ranked players in the world, underdog Gauff is a chance. She throws enough junk at the free-swinging, big-hitting Sabalenka to trouble her, hence the 5-5 head-to-head record, so the woman who played the most frighteningly bad set of the French Open might end up lifting the Suzanne Lenglen Cup.

It’s Gauff’s first decider at the French since she was thrashed 6-1 6-3 by Swiatek in 2022. “My first final here, I was super-nervous, and I kind of wrote myself off before the match even happened,” she said. “Obviously I have a lot more confidence, just from playing a grand slam final here before and doing well in another one (beating Sabalenka in the 2023 US Open final). I’ll just give it my best shot and try to be as calm and ­relaxed as possible.

“Everybody is dealing with way bigger things in life than losing finals. I’m sure there are hundreds of players who would kill to win or lose a final, so just knowing that makes me realise how lucky and privileged I am to be in this position.”

Aryna Sabalenka’s devil-may-care approach makes her a joy to watch. Picture: Alain Jocard/AFP

Two of the great sporting cliches are “carpe diem” tattoos and losers saying everything’s OK because the sun still comes up in the morning. “At first I thought it would be the end of the world if I lost, but you know, the sun still rose the next day,” Gauff said. “Knowing that, regardless of the result, the sun will still rise … I think anything can happen on Saturday. I’m looking forward to it and I’m glad to be going up against the world No.1. She can come up with some big shots, and big winners pretty much from all areas of the court, and she’s a fighter, and she’s going to stay in the match regardless of the scoreline.”

Sabalenka is the one woman you’d schedule for prime time. She pours heart, soul, blood, sweat, tears, hysterics, histrionics, effort, desire, desperation, decibels and thunderous groundstrokes into her performances, riding an emotional rollercoaster she makes no attempt to hide. Her semi-final against Swiatek was theatrical enough to get the Paris crowd ­ raucously invested. If this warrior athlete goes down to Gauff, it’ll be swinging, which makes her the most watchable female player in the world.

“The job is not done yet,” Sabalenka said before her first final in Paris. “The third set today, oh my God. Winning against Iga 6-0 on clay, it’s like something out of mind. The way that third set went, it was actually shocking for me, to be honest. It felt like a final, but again, I know the job isn’t done. I have to go out there on Saturday and I have to fight and I have to bring my best tennis and I have to work for that title against Coco.”

Sabalenka’s three major triumphs have been procured on the hardcourts of the Australian Open (2023 and 2024) and US Open (2024). Until now, she’s ­fallen short of reaching the championship bouts on the green, green grass at Wimbledon or the French Open’s empire of dirt.

“It’s going to mean everything to me and my team if I win,” Sabalenka said. “Because I have to say that almost my whole life I’ve been told clay is not my thing. Then I didn’t have any confidence.

“If I’ll be able to get this trophy, it’s just going to mean the world. I’m ready. I’m ready to do everything it’s going to take to get this win. I’m ready to go out and I’m ready to fight.”