A little bit of rugby league history was created on Thursday night in what many have described as the NRL’s game of the season in what is certainly the strangest season we’ve ever seen.
When Poasa Faamausili came off the bench for the Roosters at Suncorp Stadium it was the second week in a row he’d taken the field against the Melbourne Storm. Only a week before Faamausili was a Warriors player, loaned to the New Zealanders by the Roosters to cover some injuries in a one-season-only arrangement approved by the NRL.
But when the Chooks lost Victor Radley and Sam Verrills to second-ending knee injuries last week, coach Trent Robinson decided he needed Faamausili back.
It was a strange piece of history for the utility prop who ended up on the losing team both times. Rugby league stats guru David Middleton points out he was also the first man to play under three head coaches in three weeks.
He took the field under Steve Kearney’s watch before the Warriors coach was sacked. He then played under Kearney’s replacement, Todd Payten, in a heavy loss to the Storm before switching back to the Roosters under Robinson where a golden-point field goal extended his losing streak.
Passport to captaincy
With the ascension of Ben Stokes to the England captaincy this week, the Old Dart edges ever closer towards a full deck.
Yes, rather than the New Zealand-born all-rounder being an oddity, he joins a long list of foreign-born players to captain England. You might even call it a tradition.
By our reckoning, he’s the 18th member of this group as England ticks off another Test-playing nation to produce an England captain.
The only Test nations without an England captain to their credit are Pakistan, Sri Lanka, Bangladesh, Afghanistan and Zimbabwe. But here’s the list of nations who have: South Africa (4), India (3), Ireland (3), Australia (2), NZ (1), Scotland (1), Germany (1), Italy (1) and Peru (1).
Yes, two Australians have captained England. George “Gubby” Allen was born in Sydney but captained England in 11 Tests during the 1930s after moving there as a six-year-old. Ballarat boy Adam Hollioake led their one-day side in the late 1990s.
And the Peruvian? That would be Freddie Brown, who was born in Lima to English parents but made his way back to the motherland for school. Astonishingly his 22-Test career lasted 22 years — from 1931 to 1953. It is a long commute from Lima, after all.
The biggest losers
Congrats to Carlton’s Kade Simpson who this week joined Fitzroy’s Kevin Murray as the VFL/AFL’s biggest loser.
The Blues’ loss to St Kilda on Thursday night was Simpson’s 208th in a 330-game career (at a win rate of 36.63%), equalling Murray who played 333 games for the Lions between 1955 and 1974 (win rate 37.09%).
It’s a stat reported elsewhere in this sports section and one that is more of a reflection on Carlton’s wretched recent history than Simpson’s abilities
Who sits atop this inglorious list in the NRL? None other than Paul Gallen who last season overtook Scott Prince as the player with most NRL losses. Gallen’s inglorious milestone is more to do with his incredible longevity. He retired as a 38-year-old having played 348 first grade games — racking up 173 wins, a record 174 losses, one draw and one historic premiership — all for Cronulla.
Demons and dunces
From football’s biggest losers, to cricket’s most hopeless …
New Zealand’s Chris Martin, whose Test average of 2.36 featuring 36 Test ducks, is the most common answer when people search for the world’s worst batsman.
However, former Sussex and Yorkshire bowler Mark Robinson has a strong claim.
Aside from having the fifth worst first-class average of Englishmen who have played more than 100 games in history (4.01, Martin’s is 3.71) Robinson owns the world record for most noughts in a row. Playing for Sussex in 1990, he went scoreless 12 consecutive times, finishing the season with a total of three runs in 16 first-class innings. Robinson, who was interviewed this week on The Analyst Inside Cricket podcast, is very quick to point out seven of those 12 noughts were not out. His ability to protect his wicket took his batting average for that county season to 0.5 with a highest score of one not out.
Robinson’s excuse was that he had a rare condition where his eyes worked independent of each other, thus denying him the 3D vision needed to effectively pick up the line and length of a delivery. That didn’t stop many a fast bowler from showing him little mercy.
The Analyst episode, aptly titled Tales of the Unprotected, focuses on the beloved No 11. They are an oddity in professional sport — a bit like a featherweight boxer sent into the ring against a heavyweight.
“It’s all about the elite against the inept, the demon against the dunce, the tyrant against the terrified,” former county bowler turned podcaster and self-confessed No 11 Simon Hughes said while explaining why we love them so much.
Robinson recalled facing terrifying West Indies pacemen Courtney Walsh and Malcolm Marshall, who had both warned him to get out fast or suffer the consequences.
“Walsh told me, ‘if you don’t get out soon I’m gonna hit you on the head’,” Robinson said.
“He gave me one over before switching to around the wicket and he hit me. Marshall gave me the same warning and he hit me in the grille.”
Tough school but Robinson gets points (if not runs) for bravery. Better than Hughes — and fellow player-turned-commentator Jonathan Agnew — who have both admitted over the years to walking rather than face another ball from the fearsome Marshall.
Agnew said he once heard (rather than saw) a ball from Marshall whiz under his left armpit and, after someone in the crowd appealed for caught behind, he decided that was good enough and headed for the pavilion.
Most No 11s of the era found Pakistan’s left-arm tearaway Wasim Akram the toughest to face because he started his short and sharp run-up from behind the umpire.
“It wasn’t just not seeing the ball, it was not seeing the bowler,” Robinson said.
BC’s tip of the week
Last week we announced the retirement of our beloved racing writer Brendan Cormick. But fear not, one of Australia’s best tipsters will still have an influence in these pages. Each week we’ll endeavour to pass on Brendan’s hot tip of the week and see how he goes.
Kicking things off, Brendan likes Mick Price runner Sense Of Honour in Race 1 at Flemington. It’s a $2.80 shot that should get your day off to a flyer.
mcloughlins@theaustralian.com.au
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