Ezra Mam opens up on ‘extreme regrets’: Hitting rock bottom, rehab, Spencer Leniu apology, rebuilding trust
It’s the day Ezra Mam wishes he could have all over again. In a raw and emotional interview, Mam reveals his deep remorse over the drug-driving scandal and his commitment to rebuilding trust.
Broncos star Ezra Mam has opened up about the drug-driving scandal that sent his NRL career into free fall, revealing he has “extreme regrets” over an incident that he thinks about every day.
As he prepares for Sunday’s clash against Cronulla at Suncorp Stadium, Mam, in a raw and emotional interview, has vowed to win back the trust of rugby league fans and spoke of his battle to deal with the pressures of NRL stardom.
The Queensland squad member also addressed speculation he has a drug-and-alcohol problem, detailed his stint in rehab and outlined how NSW rival Spencer Leniu apologised in person at Origin II last Wednesday night – 16 months after their racism storm.
“I’ve worked hard to be a better person,” Mam said.
“I’ve got to deal with what I did every day.”
THE CAR CRASH
October 18, 2024. It’s the day Mam wishes he could have all over again.
It was the Black Friday when Mam’s life and NRL career went into a tailspin after being embroiled in a head-on car crash with an Uber that saw him fail a drug roadside test, while passing the breathalyser test.
Court documents showed that the Broncos playmaker had less than 0.01mg/L of cocaine in his system when he crashed after using the drug socially in the days prior.
Mam was moving house and decided to get behind the wheel, even though his driver’s licence was suspended until November 20.
Mam has copped criticism for not showing enough remorse over the incident but eight months on from the worst mistake of his career, the 22-year-old says he deals with the regret on a daily basis.
“I’m learning how to deal with that remorse,” Mam said.
“I caused an accident. The thought of my actions and potentially hurting anybody or impacting somebody’s life … I’ve got to deal with that every day of my life.
“I have extreme regrets.
“I regret the whole thing. Firstly, I regret that I didn’t just stop in the first place. I wish I didn’t drive unlicensed, it was a stupid thing to do.
“The biggest lesson learned is that my actions can have repercussions, not just to myself, but more importantly on others.
“It’s something I think of every day. I genuinely do feel for what I did and I’m trying to handle it in a good way.
“I need to hold myself to a higher standard. I genuinely do feel for what I did and now I’ve just got to let my actions do the speaking.”
ROCKSTAR TO ROCK BOTTOM
Just 12 months before the crash, Mam was one of the golden boys of rugby league.
At the tender age of 20, he was the star of the NRL grand final, scoring a hat-trick of tries to propel the Broncos to what seemed an unassailable 24-8 lead that would deliver the club’s first premiership in almost two decades.
But in a stunning collapse, Brisbane blew the biggest lead in grand-final history to lose 26-24 to Penrith. Mam was effectively four minutes away from winning the Clive Churchill Medal as man-of-the-match.
Mam’s grand-final heroics came just 17 months after his NRL debut, which saw him named Brisbane’s rookie-of-the year in 2022.
Eight months before the car crash, Mam had inked a mega five-year, $4 million extension with the Broncos. He was on top of the world.
Then it all came crashing down in a split-second of poor judgment.
“Everything happened so fast for me,” he says.
Asked if he handled the rise to NRL stardom, playing in a grand final in just his second season, Mam said: “At the time, I didn’t really know there was anything to handle.
“But in hindsight, I maybe didn’t handle that transition in my life well, no.
“After the accident, I was pretty much in a dark place.
“I don’t really want to get too deep into that. I just want to keep that in my soul, but the accident made me realise I needed to deal with certain things that I hadn’t dealt with.”
REHAB REFORMATION
The Banyans Healthcare facility is in the inner-city Brisbane suburb of Bowen Hills, just 6km from Suncorp Stadium, the Broncos’ home ground and the very place at which Mam will run out on Sunday to face the Sharks.
Mam was not the first NRL star to seek professional help at the facility.
His Maroons teammate, newly-minted Queensland skipper Cameron Munster, had a four-week stint at Banyans after his white-powder scandal at Melbourne in 2021.
In the wake of the car crash, speculation was rife Mam entered the facility to treat a drug-and-alcohol addiction, but the Broncos five-eighth says his drug-driving offence was not a sign of regular cocaine use.
“No, definitely not,” he said.
“This was definitely an isolated incident.
“For me, and for anyone in general (who goes to rehab), you get different things out of it.
“For me, it wasn’t for drugs or alcohol, but I needed to learn how to deal with things better emotionally.
“I learnt that I need to learn to talk to people more and express myself to them.
“If I wasn’t emotionally handling things well, then I need to be able to learn to speak up and reach out to people for support.
“I’m still learning about myself now and different ways I can deal with different things.”
THE PUNISHMENT
The Broncos and NRL threw the book at Mam.
He was fined a total of $120,000 ($30,000 from the NRL and $90,000 by the Broncos) and copped a further nine-game suspension, which only saw Mam return last month against the Dragons.
But it was the judicial system’s treatment of Mam that caused outrage. He was disqualified from driving for six months and hit with an $850 fine with no conviction recorded.
Mam would have copped a bigger fine ($1000) for a careless high tackle in an NRL game, fanning flames of fury that Mam was just another pampered NRL star getting off lightly.
But Mam has paid the price in more ways than one.
He has copped abuse in the streets, not to mention being consistently booed for 80 minutes by Manly fans in his second game back from suspension.
“At the end of the day, I’ve accepted my punishment,” he said.
“The NRL has punished me. The Broncos have punished me. The courts have punished me. I’m not complaining at all. I stuffed up and it’s a mistake I have taken responsibility for.
“I understand that fans may be upset with everything because I’m still upset with the situation myself. I caused the car accident, but it’s now on me to work hard, play good football and earn people’s trust back.”
RACISM APOLOGY
Mam was not only surprised by his shock selection in Queensland’s squad for Origin II, just a month after his return from NRL suspension, but taken aback by a post-match embrace with NSW rival Leniu.
The pair were embroiled in one of the biggest on-field dramas of the 2024 season when Mam, proud of his Indigenous and Torres Strait Islander heritage, was racially abused by Leniu, who called him a “monkey” during a Broncos-Roosters game in Las Vegas.
So when the full-time siren sounded after Queensland’s 26-24 win in Origin, and Leniu made a beeline for Mam to shake his hand, it was a chance to heal wounds.
“He came up to me and apologised,” Mam said.
“We had a brief, but really honest chat. I will leave the details of the conversation between us, but I appreciate and respect him for taking the time after the game to see me.
“I think being able to move on is very important. He’s a good guy and I respect that.
“The last 18 months wasn’t easy for him either. I know he would be in the same boat as me in wanting to move on and put this all behind us.
“It was closure for both of us.”
Asked if he was shocked to be selected as the Maroons’ 18th man, Mam said: “I was very grateful and honoured to get the call from Billy (Slater, Maroons coach).
“It was a very good experience for myself.”
THE COACH
Michael Maguire had just been appointed Broncos coach when news of Mam’s car crash broke. Maguire came under enormous pressure to sack Mam.
Instead, he drew a cultural line in the sand and backed Mam to turn his life around.
“It wasn’t ideal. We all understood the enormity of what happened,” Maguire said.
“In that moment in time I had to deal with it.
“I know Ezra is a good person.
“The reason you go to rehab – you go in there to bring change to your life and understand yourself and know how grateful we are for the things we have.
“Sometimes people lose their way, but you can find your way again and that’s our plan for Ezra to get back to his best.
“Everyone in life faces a challenge and it’s up to Ezra now to respond to this challenge.
“I’ve spoken to him a number of times and he is keen to make amends, very much so.
“Ezra has paid the price and now he has his chance to start afresh.”
THE FUTURE
During his time in NRL exile, Mam rose at 4.30am daily to work on a building site.
Still suspended from driving, Mam relies on lifts to training from teammates or completes 15km round-trip walks to Broncos HQ. Other times, he catches an Uber, a humbling irony not lost on Mam given the explosive events of last October.
But for all the brickbats, self-reflection, imperfection and dark times, Mam is committed to two things: breaking Brisbane’s 19-year premiership drought, but most importantly, being a good person.
“It was pretty hard being on the sidelines, but I deserved it and I needed to take time away to work on myself and own my mistakes,” he said.
“Working (on a building site) was an eye-opener.
“It was a lesson for myself in what people do everyday to pay the bills and put food on the table for the families. That’s why I appreciated it.
“My main goal is to bring success to the Broncos. We all play the game to win that premiership at the end of the year.
“We went so close a few years ago and I know we have the group of players here who are committed to doing it.
“I’d love to win that premiership not only for myself and the club, but the fans and the people of Brisbane. But most of all, I take being a role model seriously.
“I am proud of my culture and I see myself as a good person who cares about people.
“I know there are kids who look up to professional athletes and I want to be one of those role models.
“I want to make a difference in young people’s lives in a positive way but it starts and ends with hard work from myself.
“I’m growing and learning every day.”
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