That'll teach ya

WHEN she's got her fangs into a subject, there aren't many better Australian journalists than Shelley Gare.

WHEN she's got her fangs into a subject, there aren't many better Australian journalists than Shelley Gare.

So when Strewth got hold of a preview of her piece in The Spectator Australia, published today, we found a thrilling account about eccentric Danish chef Rene Redzepi and foodie cultural cringe. Redzepi made his name producing a cuisine out of local ingredients in Denmark: Icelandic ferns, juniper berries, oysters steamed with beach cabbage, and so forth. Mr Nuts and Berries, The Australian's Necia Wilden calls him. Gare tells us he turned up on stage at the Opera House at an event sponsored by The Sydney Morning Herald's Good Food Guide and "he lectures us all on how we, too, should be creating an Australian cuisine. And everyone, including Terry Durack and GFG editor Joanna Saville, just go, 'Oh yes, Rene you're so right, Rene.' " Gare surmises he's now in the US talking about Australians "who've never thought of cooking kangaroo or using wattle-seed or bush limes".

Sooky la-la Award

THE most under-reported political remark of the week award has been won by Victorian Attorney-General Rob Hulls. There has been a stink in Victoria about John Brumby's government keeping a dirt file, which the opposition believes pries into MPs' personal lives and sexual affairs. Fighting the idea that the government would stoop to keeping a dirt file, maintained by a special dirt unit in a shady corner of the administration, Hulls was unleashed as the government's attack dog. He went for Opposition Leader Ted Baillieu's throat: "[He is] a sooky la-la, cry-baby sook." Not only is this line worthy of Strewth's new award mentioned above, it should be recorded by political historians for posterity. And, for the record, Brumby says he has no knowledge of a Freedom of Information request to gain access to Baillieu's security and visitor register to identify people who have met the Opposition Leader at his office.

Who's the premier?

AT the last question time before the Victorian election on November 27, Speaker Jenny Lindell urged all the parliamentarians to behave, despite the fact there "was an element of muck-up day" about it. And Brumby made a goose of himself when he responded to a question from Baillieu by saying: "I thank the premier for his question." Is Brumby psychic?

On yer bike

THERE are mysterious omissions in Choice magazine's list of things that annoy us most, which list The Australian published yesterday. Blokes riding motorcycles that make more noise than Formula 1 racing cars, for example. Or trains that depart a minute before the timetable says they should. People who swear constantly when conversing about the weather or football. And it's really irritating to listen to a recorded voice saying "thank you for your co-operation". Or a recording offering an apology. Is it a real apology when it's delivered by a robot or a printed sign? No. Now it's time for a nice lie-down.

Mission to Mars

AS a frustrated astronaut, Strewth was in seventh heaven the other night when the second man on the moon, Buzz Aldrin, collected his honorary Lifetime of Adventure award from Australian Geographic magazine. Our hero reminded us that May 25 next year is the 60th anniversary of US president John F. Kennedy's pledge to land men on the moon by decade's end. Aldrin says that's when he'll ask "another president" to push for a space doctrine that would create international corporations to exploit asteroidal mineral resources and settle Mars. Simple, really. But Australian Geographic Society chairwoman and adventurer Sorrel Wilby had moon dust in her eyes. She asked Aldrin if sending people to Mars could reduce global overpopulation. He replied that while AG founder Dick Smith argues for a small Australia, he won't back sending excess Australians to the Red Planet.

The frustrating city

FORMER Adelaide Today Tonight host Leigh McClusky did her best yesterday to liven up an American Chamber of Commerce in Australia forum on the city's strategic plan. Opening the debate, McClusky asked state Infrastructure Minister Patrick Conlon "what the hell" the city's 30-year plan was about, before later accusing the Adelaide City Council of battling "shocking inertia" and failing to "get off the proverbial backside". She had guests giggling when she asked the minister if the government had the "intestinal fortitude" to acquire land and build a better eastern transport corridor, and called the city frustrating - "the last bloke out at five o'clock turns the lights out". Having warmed up, she said there was no love lost between the government and the council, saying the council had had its "boy bits cut off" by the government.

Tutan-Tony, RIP

HOLLYWOOD star Tony Curtis was buried on Monday with his hat, an iPhone, a bag full of photos and letters, a model of his Trans Am car, cash and two watches. Tutankhamen had silver and gold walking sticks, six chariots, two thrones and 30 jars of wine.