Strewth: Unions united

Having made his brief salute to the beauty of free speech, Pyne chuffed, and possibly stunned the MEAA with a call for solidarity.

All it took was the right protesters to turn up for Christopher Pyne to top his advocacy of free speech by standing up for union members. He was at Caboolture in Queensland for a joint press conference with Trevor Ruthenberg, the Liberal National Party by-election candidate for the seat of Longman. (Yes, Ruthenberg was duly honoured as “Big Trev”). But first Pyne had to wade through the heckles of union protesters. Having made his brief salute to the beauty of free speech, Pyne indicated it might be nice if the protesters took a breather. “I think you need to let the journalists do their job,” he said, brightening as he flicked the switch to solidarity. “The journalists are probably members of the media and arts union!” (The Media, Entertainment & Arts Alliance will be chuffed, and possibly stunned.) Pyne’s sparring partner Anthony Albanese wrestled with another challenge down the road (see the Sketch on page 4), while at the Morayfield pre-polling station Labor MPs Graham Perrett and Milton Dick were among those lending a hand to Susan Lamb,with senator Jenny McAllister due to follow. Coalition senator James McGrath was on deck for Ruthenberg, wearing the expression of a man endlessly pleased by democracy in all its manifestations. Not that everyone was having such a fine time, with a One Nation volunteer wearing a GoPro after some incidents involving what at best could be termed poor manners. On a happier note, the One Nation troops seemed pleased with their “Silence of the Lamb” posters, which had the face of the Labor candidate presented a la the movie poster for Silence of the Lambs, complete with the death’s-head hawkmoth. It was probably meant to be negative, but it made us think of Jodie Foster listening to Anthony Hopkins enthuse about what pairs best with chianti.

Porky dig

In Tasmania, Malcolm Turnbull went on Sea FM and got back on his hobbyhorse about Bill Shorten and “Labor lies”. The Prime Minister made a dozen mentions of lies during the interview. Not a record for him by any stretch but enough for host Jess to make a point about the relentless negativity of campaigns and how hard it is for parents to shield kids from the nastiness. Turnbull’s interpretation of how he should reply was, like an Adam Sandler flick, vaguely amusing but ultimately deflating.

Turnbull: “So I can understand why parents are distressed about it because they bring their children up to tell the truth and they’re being treated, from Justine Keay and from Bill Shorten, with lies — and I’m not being negative in saying that, I’m just telling the truth.”

Jess: “I don’t think that’s what people are upset about.”

Turnbull: “Sorry?”

In praise of brevity

On the endless Labor leadership front, the deadest bat this week (so far at least) has been played by the opposition Treasury spokesman.

Journo: “Have you spoken to Anthony Albanese about any of the speculation that has been around?”

Chris Bowen: “No.”

Like Canberra’s Cockington Green, it is perfection in miniature.

Katter batters

Talk of dead bats always pushes our thoughts in the direction of Bob Katter. The nation’s premier flying fox non-fan, however, was busy with a different target: the not unanimously beloved My Health Record. He’s cross enough about it that when he erupted with a seething press release on the matter yesterday, there was hope Katman once again would go for a sudden escalation as he did recently when ripping into the pack of bums he holds responsible for white spot disease reaching the Australian prawn industry. To wit: “They stand up there with the Byzantine traitor who opened the gate to allow the Ottoman Turks into Constantinople, the greatest city and centre of Christianity in Europe. You are right up there with them.” No one was cast into the furnace of history this time but, limbering up for his furious finale, Katter opted to do more with less: “I read George Orwell’s Nineteen Eighty-Four and it scares me still. Big Brother is watching.”

That unlovin’ feline

News of the Nine Network-Fairfax Media merger yesterday prompted Paul Keating to characterise Nine as having the morals of an alley cat. For those of you feeling a bit of deja vu, it could be because Keating applied the insult just over a decade ago to journalist Paddy McGuinness. Of course McGuinness was safely dead and due to be buried the next day, leaving a shocked Greg Lindsay to wish Keating had said it when McGuinness was still alive so that “they could have just slugged it out in a Balmain bar”.

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