Strewth: Touched by ScoMo

Scott Morrison was asked about his leadership aspirations. “Me?” he replied, nearly dislocating his eyebrows.

Karl Stefanovic wasn't expecting such a cutting response from Julie Bishop to his question about the Liberals’ leadership.

Towards the end of his joint press conference with Malcolm Turnbull and Mathias Cormann yesterday, Scott Morrison was asked about his own leadership aspirations. “Me?” he replied, nearly dislocating his eyebrows. Then, possibly remembering Noiseworks’ exhortation to reach out and reach out and reach out touch somebody, he laid his hand upon the PM’s shoulder and declared, “This is my leader.” Up until that point, Turnbull had looked as knackered and deflated as, say, a generous Liberal donor who’d been treated with serial ingratitude. Or as a PM who’d agreed to his conservative wing’s same-sex marriage demands, then been bucketed by them anyway. Or both. But as the hand settled, Turnbull brightened for the first time in days: “Thanks, ScoMo.” All it needed was for Cormann to join in with a Teutonic cry of “Group hug!” but, for better or worse, he did not.

No going zone

Julie Bishop’s joint presser with New Zealand Deputy PM Winston Peters didn’t stop when she wanted. “And on that point, the Deputy PM and I are leaving because he’s got a very important speech to make,” the Foreign Minister said, then made to leave, just stopping short of nudging Peters away from the podium. But inertia won the day, Peters staying glued to the spot and listening to a question from our esteemed colleague Primrose Riordan. “She’s a female, I have to answer the question; I don’t want to seem like a chauvinist,” Peters explained, drawing a “Did you really just say that?” from Bishop. Anyway, Peters ploughed on, his eyes twinkling while Bishop’s blazed. And, bless him, Peters — who had previously offered this pearl, “The first thing you do when you’re a visiting politician is put your nose into another country’s business” — dropped in this timely wisdom: “When you go into a spill you’ve got to take your abacus.”

.@JulieBishopMP says yesterday’s spill “was an endorsement of the Prime Minister's leadership.” #9Today pic.twitter.com/EEuPkOA1CH

— The Today Show (@TheTodayShow) August 21, 2018

Never say dead

Earlier in the day, Bishop had a chat on the Nine Network’s Today show with co-host Karl Stefanovic. To no one’s great surprise, Turnbull was the topic of discussion, as were Bishop’s conversations with him. “What’s it like talking to a man on death row?” asked Stefanovic. Bishop, possibly bearing Today’s ratings in mind, replied with a line hewn from the coldest granite: “Well, I am talking to you, Karl.”

Wrong way to the top

Meanwhile on Triple M, freshly minted backbencher Peter Dutton came a cropper when he was asked to nominate his favourite AC/DC song. Pleading sleep deprivation, Dutton passed. While some were ready to accuse him of being un-Australian, picking a favourite Acca Dacca ditty can be a tough gig. For some it’s like being asked to name a favourite among their children. For others it’s just the challenge of discerning any difference. As Acca Dacca’s Angus Young put it years back: “I’m sick and tired of people saying that we put out 11 albums that sound exactly the same. In fact, we’ve put out 12 albums that sound exactly the same.” On Sky News, Labor’s Ed Husic suggested Highway to Hell but declined an invitation to sing it: “The public have been through enough and I don’t think that they need to hear me singing on top of that.” Here’s Christopher Pyne’s wisdom, as offered to journalist Neil McMahon for his Good Weekend piece last year on Australia’s enduring ABBA fever: “To be a political figure you have to pretend your favourite band is AC/DC or INXS … but when people want to dance at a wedding, they put on Waterloo or Dancing Queen.”

Roman and Gladiator

While the spectre of the High Court hovered behind Dutton yesterday, there were also questions about the time he intervened in the case of a pair of au pairs. Guardian Australia tweeted its story: “Former border force head ‘has knowledge’ of Dutton’s au pair visa decision.” Whereupon that former Border Force chief, Roman Quaedvlieg, chimed in: “Well, I was having a quiet afternoon until this popped up. I’m sure you’ll understand that Twitter is probably not the medium for me to make any preliminary, liminary, or corpus comments on this issue. Going back to what I was doing now.” Ahem. On a different Twitter note, Russell Crowe has had a listen to Adelaide radio FiveAA’s Two Tribes segment, in which Pyne and Anthony Albanese are hosted each week by David Penberthy and Will Goodings. This week’s was particularly solid and Rusty tweeted his seal of approval: “Just listened on @1395FIVEaa, A most civil, gentlemanly and productive political chat, I’ve not heard the like for awhile. The presenters were direct without being rude, the politicians didn’t talk over each other. Refreshing. More of this. @AlboMP @cpyne.”

[e-mail]