School's in

WHEN Strewth last walked out of question time in federal parliament a couple of months ago, Christopher Pyne was, at the firm suggestion of Speaker (and patron saint of the perpetually exasperated) Harry Jenkins, withdrawing some unparliamentary language, and Kevin Rudd was spouting something in his own particular tongue.

WHEN Strewth last walked out of question time in federal parliament a couple of months ago, Christopher Pyne was, at the firm suggestion of Speaker (and patron saint of the perpetually exasperated) Harry Jenkins, withdrawing some unparliamentary language, and Kevin Rudd was spouting something in his own particular tongue.

So it was reassuring that when we walked back in yesterday for the last question time before the budget speech, Pyne was, at the firm insistence of Jenkins, withdrawing some unparliamentary language, then Rudd said something about "when the rubber hits the road". It was as if we'd barely missed a beat. But it was subdued for a while; even Wilson Tuckey didn't get around to really raising his voice until nearly 40 minutes in, which had us worried. We knew it couldn't possibly have been because most of the press gallery was locked away elsewhere in the building (possibly fulfilling the fantasy of a few MPs). Was it simply the distraction of the forthcoming budget speech? Was it the absence of Wayne Swan that had deflated everybody so? Perhaps sensing the chamber needed something to lift the mood, Rudd thoughtfully tossed out the line, "This government has become the friend of small business." The resulting tumult could have dislodged contact lenses, and even eclipsed the hullabulloo that followed the PM's later insistence that neither he nor the government had altered their views on climate change. It was all very merry, then Sophie Mirabella, who once came over all offended after Belinda Neal insulted her, explained to Rudd: "No one believes you any more, you fool." There's always one.

Not so financial

DESPITE the town's reputation, there are plenty of nice places in Canberra for a media organisation to choose from for its post-budget knees-up, so we were a little distressed to hear The Australian Financial Review was reduced to have its celebration in one of Parliament House's cafeterias, the Queens Terrace Cafe. We know things are a little tight at The Fin at the moment, but we would have thought that as this paper had done so much to relieve the pressure on their payroll by poaching so many of its senior writers, they'd have at least a bit left in the kitty. Pass the hat?

Verbal abuse

OH, how we hinted. How we pleaded. How we shed our final vestiges of dignity and hurled ourselves at Tony Abbott's feet, begging him to stop the drip-drip-drip torture of his endlessly repeated "great big new tax" (Strewth, last week). So while we were relieved the Iron Monk desisted yesterday, we were saddened when his lieutenants Ian Macfarlane (we had such high hopes for him) and Warren Truss (we always thought him a gent) gladly did the dirty GBNT work for him in question time. The only thing that kept our mind from wandering to thoughts of self-harm was our sheer awe at watching Resources Minister Martin Ferguson using some sort of highly advanced stealth technology to slip whole squadrons of syllables past our ears undetected.

Twitter-free zone

JULIA Gillard has divided the education sector with the MySchool website, but what sites do the Deputy Prime Minister and her staff members access the most? A snapshot of the web-browsing record of the ministerial office of the Deputy PM and Minister for Education, Employment, Workplace Relations and Social Inclusion provides a unique insight into their preferences and priorities. In November and December last year, when the government was still testing its controversial MySchool website, computers in Gillard's ministerial office most frequently accessed the social networking site Facebook, Media Monitors and The Age. Gillard has her own official Facebook page and, as part of her ministerial responsibilities, has reminded parents that social networking sites can also be used to continue bullying outside the schoolyard. The Australian's website was one of the 10 most frequently accessed sites in November, along with the ABC website, Google and World Skills Australia, the only organisation on the list that is directly linked to Gillard's responsibilities. But those three sites dropped off the list in December when the end of parliamentary sessions, and the pending holiday period, had those who work in the ministerial office looking more at ANZ, Qantas and The Sydney Morning Herald sites. No Twitter, though, so perhaps we should just give a round of applause.

Where is thy sting?

TO bee or not to bee? That was the question for opposition climate action spokesman Greg Hunt when he was frocking up for the cover shot on his Flinders Small Business Report 2010. Given the member for Flinders is posing among beehives and hoisting a bee-encrusted comb out of one of them, he has chosen wisely with a mask and protective suit sturdy enough for beekeeping in Chernobyl. In fact, he'd look like a model of sensibility rather than a nervous nelly except that the apiarist is right next to him with a hand in the hive, wearing nothing more protective than short sleeves and an amused grin.