Rich in fibre

Markets for Change and Get Up! yesterday launched a campaign accusing Harvey Norman of using native timber.

AS they launched their campaign accusing Harvey Norman of using native timber, Markets for Change and Get Up! yesterday distributed to journalists an information pack that included a 38-page booklet titled Retailing the Forests, an 18-page booklet titled No Harvey No, a five-page interview transcript, three single-page press releases and, for good measure, a three-page explanation of No Harvey No.

For convenience, it came neatly enclosed in a cardboard folder. Could be half a tree in there.

Up for the count

THERE was neither tea nor coffee at the morning "tea" with Governor-General Quentin Bryce after yesterday's swearing in of new senators; indeed, the G-G was obliged to dispatch her aide-de-camp to Aussies cafe for a flat white. Perhaps it was this caffeine deprivation that led to the small hiccup in the Nationals' camp. Following an email sharing the happy news that NSW senator Fiona Nash "welcomes new senator to Nationals team", a fresh version was soon sent out with this: "CORRECTION: brings Nationals Senate team to six, not five." As you were.

Jim'll fix it

EARLY yesterday, when the sparrow orchestra was still just warming up its proverbial wind section, Barnaby Joyce was already on the blower to Ross Solly at ABC 666 [frequency of the Beast?] in a discussion that started with his Latin and climaxed with the Greened Senate. Asked Solly, "So you think this is the end as we know it, as Jim Morrison and the Doors might have once sung? I don't know whether you are a fan of Jim Morrison?" Replied Joyce, "Absolutely I'm a fan of him, but no I don't think it's the end -- it might be the Roadhouse Blues, but I don't think it's the end of it." Two primary messages of Roadhouse Blues were: a) Keep your eyes on the road, your hands upon the wheel, and b) Gonna have a real good time. So it could work out.

How shall I put it

HOW to Answer a Question, a series with Tony Abbott:

Journo: "Mr Abbott, have you muzzled any of your shadow ministers, in particular Malcolm Turnbull?"

Abbott: "I want all of my shadows to be out there exposing the faults in a bad government getting worse. Now, sometimes they'll want to choose the right opportunity for that but I am absolutely determined that all of my ministers should be out there exposing the faults of a bad government that's getting worse."

Journo: "Does your office vet those interview requests?"

Abbott: "I want my ministers to be out there before the right audiences, exposing the faults of a bad government that's getting worse. Thank you." The end.

Best laid plans

ONE of our favourite Robin Williams gags depicts a chicken and an egg in bed, the egg taking a drag on a cigarette and saying, "Well, I guess that answers that question." Which brings us to yesterday's estimates hearings in South Australia, where Deputy Opposition Leader Mitch Williams and committee chair Chloe Fox tackled one of the big ones:

Fox: "The issue is -- and this is a question and answer session but it is also a discussion and the very nature of estimates, as you well know having been here longer in this place than I, is that, as I said on Friday, it is free-ranging: free-ranging like an egg so I think --"

Williams: "It is the chicken that is free ranging, ma'am, not the egg."

Fox: "There are many chickens in the room; indeed, there are some roosters. Carry on."

Someone had to ask

HEADLINE of the day, courtesy of California's The Orange County Register: "Mental illness and firearms: can they ever mix?"

He came, he's sore

WE hear Nationals MP Michael McCormack is on the sore side after being coaxed into filling in for the Ungarie Football Club Seniors on the weekend alongside his 13-year-old son Nicholas. It was apparently McCormack Sr's second game of Australian Rules (which puts him two games, arguably three, ahead of Strewth) and is now nursing a couple of suspected broken ribs. Alas, Ungarie was beaten by Cobar. On the plus side, McCormack Jr was named among the best players.

Release the hound

CONTINUING the proud tradition that saw him air his thoughts on the Australian Defence Force Academy scandal, Bob Ellis has triggered another seismic reaction with his latest piece for the ABC's intellectual clearing house, the Drum. The piece is headlined, "The Strauss-Kahn moment: has feminism gone too far?" We won't delve into the details here, but we were struck that the piece appears to have finally pushed writer Marieke Hardy -- who harbours such a soft spot for Ellis she named her canine companion after him -- over the edge. Cracked Hardy, "My dog Bob Ellis is choosing to ignore the fact that human Bob Ellis appears to have smoked some crack before writing his new column." And so, if we may borrow from Ellis borrowing from Kurt Vonnegut, it goes.