Mal no bunny

MALCOLM Turnbull can say cheerio to those shaggy cat stories now he's been photographed with a Playboy Bunny.

MALCOLM Turnbull can say cheerio to those shaggy cat stories now he's been photographed with a Playboy Bunny.

Denise Pernula, one of Turnbull's fellow guests on the Ten Network's The Circle yesterday, was decked out in a bunny uniform so tight, her chest looked like a pair of tan Volkswagen Beetles backing out of a shiny black carport. Turnbull and Pernula were snapped together on the green room sofa, though Mal was, admittedly, leaning as far as he could in the opposite direction without falling off. Pernula was later asked if she and Mal had exchanged any chitchat. "Not really; I think I kinda scared him," she replied, adding: "I don't want to ruin any political careers." As for Mal, he was asked if he would be throwing his hat in the ring to lead the Libs once more if Labor won the next election. Mal looked surprised, as though the idea had never occurred to him*, saying, "I don't think that's very likely." Co-host Yumi Stynes saw through this one: "I think the fact that you're here on this couch suggests you're interested in being, potentially, leader." For good measure, her colleague Chrissie Swan chipped in: "There's no other backbenchers here." Mal suggested this was perhaps "a Circle-led recovery". (*Not even remotely true.)

Shining lights

HOW politics works, in a nutshell. On Thursday, Tony Abbott visited Mackay, where he was coy about providing money - should he become PM - to fund proper lighting and whatnot for the football stadium being built there: "Let's see what happens; I am certainly not going to start a bidding war." Come Friday, come this announcement from the incumbents: "Today, the Rudd government announced a further $2.5 million to deliver a state-of-the-art stadium for Mackay. Work on the stadium is now under way, and the new investment will ensure NRL-standard stadium lighting, seating on three sides of the stadium, a sealed car park, upgraded hospitality facilities and a community room."

Dr Kev says no

SUNRISE co-host David Koch appears to be thinking of a post-Lodge role for Kevin Rudd, only to come up with a vision of the PM as the Loin King. While it's appropriately African-flavoured, given the FIFA World Cup, we wish he hadn't.

Koch: "Harry Kewell's groin has been a concern for the entire nation ahead of the World Cup. A South African witch doctor . . . says Kewell needs a get-well message from Australia's Prime Minister so he can be healed in time to play for the Socceroos . . ."

Rudd: "You know, Kochie, sometimes there's things that sort of catch you on the backfoot in politics. And being provided advice by a South African witch doctor to fix Harry Kewell's groin is just, kind of, right out there . . . . Can I just say, I reckon Harry Kewell wouldn't want me anywhere near the fixing of his groin. I think there's a whole lot of professional people who can do that." And on and on it went, imagery piled on imagery of the PM hovering around Kewell's offside with a tube of Dencorub. Just in case anyone missed it, Rudd tweeted about it as well.

For the price of a loo

EVER since we learned that under Building the Education Revolution a school toilet block could set you back $800,000, Strewth has been in a daze, trying to imagine what such a dunny could look like - surely a khazi fit for a kaiser. Curiously, we've been meandering through some government tenders and found that for the same dough (give or take a few bucks), you can get what the PM's department characterises as "contracts for design, project management and construction services for changes to the fit out of areas within the Department of the Prime Minister and Cabinet, including creating a top-secret area within the department to accommodate the National Security staff". We would think of it as Building the Espionage Revolution, were it not for the clashing initials.

Not another Fergie

UNTIL the Strewth laboratory succeeds in its efforts to clone Martin Ferguson, we'll have to make do with the many members of his extended family (including brother Laurie) who are already serving the public. Happily, one more is angling to get in: brother Andrew Ferguson, secretary of the Construction Forestry Mining and Energy Union, has put himself forward for a vacant Left slot on Labor's ticket for the NSW upper house. This has resulted in an anonymous pamphlet: "Ferguson family public funding project - Please help provide funding for another struggling member of the Ferguson family. Unable to survive in the world of private enterprise, they must feed from the teat of the public purse." Though this appears to come from factional enemies who are themselves on the public teat, we'll just have to let that one slide.

Putin's demons

COMPARE that approach to Russia, where schoolchildren in St Petersburg have been given a prayer to say for PM Vladimir Putin, asking the power/s above to keep him safe from "demonic temptations". Putin has denied there is a personality cult growing around him. We suspect the same cannot be said for South Australian Treasurer Kevin Foley.