Kevin under-7

THE initial still photographs of Kevin Rudd trying out his bowling arm in Hobart yesterday looked encouraging enough.

THE initial still photographs of Kevin Rudd trying out his bowling arm in Hobart yesterday looked encouraging enough.

Joining Tasmanian Premier David Bartlett to play cricket with a bunch of kids, the Prime Minister, tasteful sky-blue tie notwithstanding, looked the goods. Or at least until the stills were superseded by moving footage, helpfully screened by the Nine Network later in the day as commentators Ian Healy, Michael Slater and Richie Benaud chatted with the PM during the second day of the Third Test at Bellerive Oval. "It's pretty disturbing that you've got the footage," Rudd observed. Even with our honours degree in cricket duncery, Strewth was a tad alarmed by the spectacle that proceeded to unfurl on the TV screen. As our impartial cricket adviser opined to us afterwards, "Rudd was a bit like Max `Tangles' Walker: arms everywhere, but at least he aimed at the plastic stumps. He was bowling to kids so maybe he was keeping his best stuff under wraps. He was a lot better than John Howard but still very ungainly." Given a chance to describe his bowling action, Rudd characterised it as "one capable of getting 8m down a pitch". Still, it wasn't all modesty; there was also some time spent revelling in the young scalps collected: "I dismissed two five-year-olds. I looked like a cruel PM as a result." But there was one who put up more of a fight: "He was six, that one. I was really pitching to my own ability level." Rudd also reflected on the reality of picking the Prime Minister's XI ("The PM does what he's told") but also managed to deliver a blow to ageism by leaving the door open for Benaud, who's nudging 80, to join the team next time.

Over the undies

SOME days we wonder why NSW "works" the way it does. Other days something happens, such as a debate about whether a former state minister sacked months ago for dancing in his office while clad in nought but his undies did in fact dance in his office clad in nought but his undies, and we experience something akin to what alcoholics refer to as a moment of clarity. So it was yesterday, with Matt Brown, the former police minister ditched after just three days by then premier Nathan Rees over accusations of undergarment-related misdemeanours and general lewdness, finally telling his tale of woe to Sydney's Daily Telegraph under the 24-carat headline, "I've never danced in my undies". Rees, however, wasn't backing away from dumping Brown, telling Strewth yesterday: "I'm entirely comfortable with the decision I made at the time." Rees has been on the wrong side of the boot since then, of course, and added this conciliatory note: "Having said that, he has subsequently worked hard for his electorate and he deserves to put the incident behind him." A bit like his undies.

Boogie tights

WHILE Tony Abbott goes about forming his green army, Strewth has been pondering what sort of uniform the troops should wear. Frankly, it's hard for us to go past a glorious vision we had yesterday afternoon of an outfit that is Superman meets Errol Flynn-era Robin Hood: green tights with red Speedos worn on the outside. Dressed like that, they'd be unstoppable. In the meantime, though, we were disappointed that when the freshly and enthusiastically environmental Abbott visited the Sydney building that houses the Strewth cave, he ignored the perfectly sturdy staircase and took the lift. Still, it's early days.

Tweet corn

SOUTH Australian Education Minister Jane Lomax-Smith has, like many, been touched by the catastrophe in Haiti and taken to Twitter to say so. For example: "Does anybody know if Cuba close enough to be hit by earthquake" and, a little more cryptically, "Why so many journos and so little aid in Haiti". Whatever did she mean? Was she upset about widespread media coverage of the tragedy? But wouldn't this in turn help increase donations to aid agencies? One of Strewth's agents was subsequently moved to ask Lomax-Smith how much the Rann government was giving in aid to Haiti. Lomax-Smith responded: "I'm amazed that someone would seek to deconstruct, analyse and dissect a 10-word tweet about an extraordinary overseas tragedy that has affected so many people." Perhaps it's a case of what goes on Twitter, stays on Twitter.

Gas bagged

GIVEN that BP Ultimate (that's top-shelf unleaded, for all you Amish readers) costs a packet extra at the bowser, Strewth has been mildly curious about what it is they put in or take out that makes it such a premium drop. The latest batch of explanatory posters ("Fuel + Vrroom = BP Ultimate") doesn't really clarify matters. Perhaps it's related to Dr Seuss's The Cat in the Hat Comes Back, in which the titular feline saves the day with miniature cats and something called a Voom. Then again, Dr Seuss is a bit foggy: "Now, don't ask me what Voom is. I will never know. But, boy! Let me tell you it does clean up snow!"

Get your Phil

WE realise Prince William is coming without his mum and dad on his jaunt down under, but would it be too much to beg at this late stage that he bring his paternal grandfather? Prince Phillip, especially if he were in a cranky or chatty mood (or both), would be a godsend for Strewth. Come on Will, you know there's a way.