Given the finger

IT was probably during the nanoseconds between Kevin Rudd's crack about "7.30 Report land" and the chilly "mate" he swung into Kerry O'Brien like an ice pick (hyperbole licence No 57300) that the simple yet inspirational equation lit up in the collective brain of the ALP: get grumpy, get traction!

IT was probably during the nanoseconds between Kevin Rudd's crack about "7.30 Report land" and the chilly "mate" he swung into Kerry O'Brien like an ice pick (hyperbole licence No 57300) that the simple yet inspirational equation lit up in the collective brain of the ALP: get grumpy, get traction!

Sure, even if we lived for 1000 years we doubt we'd see Julia Gillard try it, but that doesn't mean all her colleagues feel the same way. Check out Financial Services Minister Chris Bowen, in the left-hand photo, holding forth on the subject of Tony Abbott on Sky News's AM Agenda yesterday. The scowl could do with some work but that stern forefinger shows a lot of promise. But not everyone can be equal. Turn to Craig Emerson on the right, as seen during his appearance on ABC1's Lateline on Thursday night, to see a true master in action. Behold the almost cannibalistic scowl, reel at that index finger that looks as if it's going to ram through your retinas and press a point against the inside of your cranium. It appears those acting lessons Emmo admitted to last month are paying off.

Andrews a teen idol

THANKS to Mother Nature, things didn't go according to plan for everyone trying to leave the national capital yesterday. When the fog finally lifted, many political figures - including Philip Ruddock, George Brandis and Bob Hawke - had to ride in economy, though we're sure that as men of the people they wouldn't have been unhappy. The most surprising sight at Canberra airport, however, was surely lapsed immigration minister Kevin Andrews getting mobbed by schoolgirls. Our witness remains in the Strewth recovery suite in a stable condition.

Slow on the update

WE gather Ruddock made it in time for Abbott's lunchtime address in Sydney, joining a swag of other Liberal Party luminaries including John Howard, Alexander Downer, Julie Bishop, Andrew Robb, Malcolm Turnbull, Barry O'Farrell and Alan Stockdale (but alas, no Peter Costello). Among the speakers was former Howard adviser Arthur Sinodinos, the man who played coy about his intentions to run for Wentworth until Turnbull decided it was no longer there for the taking; yesterday Sinodinos referred to Turnbull as "the once and future member for Wentworth". Pop over to the visitor's page on Parliament House's website, though, and the first thing you'll see is Turnbull as the once and eternal party leader, happily ensconced in the opposition leader's seat.

ABC high ground

ABC 891 Mornings' Plutarch-promoting radio duo in Adelaide, Matt Abraham and David Bevan, took the moral high ground yesterday about not naming Adelaide teacher Correne Woolmer, who had admitted to cheating on Julia Gillard's NAPLAN tests for school students. "Hasn't she suffered enough? The ABC has not named her but she has been named and shamed in the newspapers; anyone would have thought it was the crime of the century," Abraham opined, not unreasonably. But who was that in the media stakeout outside Woolmer's house all morning? Why, a TV crew from the ABC.

Smith's unity ticket

WE still hope Bill Leak's dream comes true and Britain's new Conservative-Liberal Democrat coalition names itself the Con-Dems. In the meantime, lobbyist and veteran Liberal Party operative Ian Smith is confident about its prospects. And Smith knows a thing or two about uniting disparate political forces, having not only gone into business with Alexander Downer and former Labor senator Nick Bolkus but also marrying former Australian Democrats leader Natasha Stott Despoja. "All those nay-sayers saying David Cameron and Nick Clegg won't work should look no further than our marriage," he tells Strewth. "Seven years and two kids later; all going well." Give or take the accidental mental image of a couple of Cameron-Clegg sprogs, these are encouraging words.

Kids still love them

WHEN Strewth headed to Canberra this week, we carried an important document: our seven-year-old daughter's plan to save the world, as drawn up for the eyes of Turnbull. Young Daisy was very specific about this: it was for Mal and no one else. Pondering her Turnbull obsession, we turned for advice to The Australian's chief political correspondent Matthew Franklin, only to discover he was dealing with his own daughter's sworn mission to hug the PM. While admitting to feeling "slightly disturbed" by the development, Franklin was trying to take it philosophically: "Perhaps it indicates an empathy beyond what you would expect in a four-year-old. Maybe Margot, like a lot of kids of journalists, spends too much time looking at newspapers and watching or listening to political interviews and not enough time playing in the back yard. In any event, if Kev wants a hug, he should give us a call."