Eggs mark the spot

The application of yolk to Fraser Anning’s bonce begs a question: What’s the place of the humble egg in Aussie political discourse?

Yolk’s on him: a re-enactment of the Billy Hughes egg incident in Warwick, the role of the egger played by one of his descendants.

When Will Connolly responded to Fraser Anning’s Christchurch disgrace by applying a raw egg to the senator’s bonce — a rather contentious bit of value-adding — there was, amid the ensuing commotion, some contemplation. What is the place of the humble egg in Australian political discourse? Is it a “great Australian pastime”, as claimed a few years back by Bob Katter? (More on him anon.) Malcolm Fraser was met with eggs when arriving for a Liberal fundraiser at Sydney’s Wentworth Hotel. An egg got thrown at John Hewson during the 1993 election campaign, only for the Fightback king to catch it — and, more crucially, catch it intact. National Action leader Michael Brander was less nimble in 1994, copping an egg in his mouth, an incident Nine news opted to replay in slow motion that evening as a “hole in one”.

Other way of copping it

But if it’s retaliation you’re after, look back to the thick of the World War I conscription campaign in 1917 — the year that was, perhaps coincidentally, displayed on Connolly’s T-shirt in Roman numerals* — when Billy Hughes copped a fowl ovum in Warwick, Queensland. Lobbed by Patrick Michael Brosnan, the egg succeeded in taking off the PM’s hat. Hughes reached into his jacket for his revolver, only to realise he’d left it on the train. As the icing on the cake, the local wallopers refused to arrest Brosnan, informing the PM they weren’t about to take orders from him. (Highlights from The Age at the time: “Riotous outbreak”; “disgraceful proceedings”; “Mr Hughes assaulted”; “tackles his assailants”; “appeal to police ignored”; “will only obey state laws”.) Hughes got the pip so thoroughly about all this, he set about establishing what would in time become the Australian Federal Police. (*A nice catch by writer Eleanor Robertson.)

Shell out the Katter way

In Brisbane in 1964, a young Bob Katter and his mates threw eggs at the Beatles as — and we quote him with all due solemnity — an “intellectual reaction against Beatlemania”. When Strewth once asked Katter to clarify some aspects of the Beatles/egg story (which cried out for the headline “Yolk! Oh no!”), he began singing Love Me Do for the benefit of the rest of the cafe we were in. So when Paul McCartney toured Australia in 2017, effectively bringing himself back within egging range, we asked Katter if he had a rematch on his mind. “I’ve got to give Macca a chance to get back at me,” he said. “So I’ll let him throw eggs at me — over 20m, and I’m allowed to duck but not move my feet. So it’s eggs at 20m.” Ultimately, though, it was just another added to the pile of missed opportunities. Sticking with English yolk-targets, British deputy PM John Prescott got egged in Wales in 2001. Unlike Anning’s, Prescott’s assailant was a grown man and Prescott punched him, then scuffled with him. And being a former amateur boxer, Prescott wasn’t going to outsource the job and did it all himself. As Tony Blair put it: “John is John.” OK, enough eggs. Or as we should say, ova and out.

Communicator wanted

The ABC is in search of a “head of group product”. Indeed, it’s after someone who could “build a user centric product ecosystem”. Furthermore: “The role will evolve the product road map, shift product metrics, embed a collaborative culture and manage a wide range of key stakeholders.” Um, pardon? For the purpose of getting Jon Kudelka’s day off to a proper start, we’ll mention an errant apostrophe hiding in plain view: “helping the ABC to remain relevant and connected to Australian’s”. Not quite enough to make you ponder plucking out your eyeballs with a cry of “Out, vile jelly! Where is thy lustre now?” Still, the ABC knows it is in urgent need of “an excellent communicator” who’ll “embody the ABC principles of straight talking”. It is a need perfectly emphasised by the full sentence: “With a sense of passion and energy, you will be an excellent communicator and embody the ABC principles of straight talking, people focused, accountable, open and transparent.” Unquote.

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