Dog-eat-dog life

IT'S been a while since Bill Hayden roused the drover's dog from its metaphorical kennel, but thanks to Kevin Rudd and Julia Gillard, we're thinking the relationship between canines and ALP leadership tensions could be worth investigating.

IT'S been a while since Bill Hayden roused the drover's dog from its metaphorical kennel, but thanks to Kevin Rudd and Julia Gillard, we're thinking the relationship between canines and ALP leadership tensions could be worth investigating.

Hayden, of course, invoked the pooch after he was rolled by Bob Hawke just before the 1983 election, giving us the downbeat zinger, "A drover's dog could lead the Labor Party to victory at the present time." Now, as Rudd gets a bit of a dust-up in the opinion polls (such ingratitude after saving us from the GFC), he's been seeking solace by hugging his dog, Abby. Then there's Gillard. Asked yesterday about the leadership speculation, she said, "There's more chance of me becoming the full forward for the Dogs than there is of any change in the Labor Party." Meanwhile, one of our senior sports gurus has suggested Gillard arrange a work-share deal with Barry Hall.

Bronnie's buzzing

WHEN Strewth outed the Bronwyn "Oh, beehive yourself" Bishop on Twitter as a fake in March, whoever was channelling the member for Mackellar boasted 524 followers, including the real Bishop's daughter, Network Ten entertainment reporter Angela Bishop. And fair enough; the faux Bishop had put in a startlingly plausible performance for seven months before a rogue tweet ("Mr Rudd needs to rule out US-style death panels from his healthcare 'reform' plan") led Strewth to a chat with Bishop's flack Damien Jones, who declared the Bronnie tweets bogus. And yet "Bishop" keeps accruing new followers (nearly up to 700) for her spasmodic tweets, the latest lobbing on Thursday: "Splendid budget reply speech by Tony Abbott, though I hope Joe Hockey will spell out some real savings initiatives next week." Happily, we hear that the following night, Ten's political editor Paul Bongiorno revealed on the evening news, "Bronwyn Bishop for one could be looking for more. She thought Mr Abbott's speech splendid, although she hopes Joe Hockey will spell out some real savings." Meanwhile, you can catch the real Bronnie in action this Saturday on the Sunshine Coast, where she'll be the star attraction of "Breakfast with Bronwyn", which is happening incongruously-aptly (delete where applicable) at the Caloundra Powerboat Club. At only $25 a head and with the added bonuses of federal member Peter Slipper and his state counterpart, Mark McArdle, it sounds like a win-win-win-win scenario. We're just not sure what's for breakfast.

Taxed by cliches

STREWTH is beginning to flag in the battle against Abbott's "great big new tax". In our weaker moments, we wish Abbott would at least do a Bear Grylls and vary the form of suffering, but that GBNT just keeps coming: three times yesterday in as many breaths. But is moaning pointless? Should we just give up and try something more achievable, say, knitting a ladder to the moon? Or should we take heart that some of the team aren't quite getting with the program? Take for example Russell Matheson, the Liberal candidate for the Sydney seat of Macarthur, who flanked the Iron Monk yesterday and referred to "this new big super tax".

Recriminations fly

THE story of the 2007 murder of Robert Rowlingson by his brother, Anthony, in the Darling Downs town of Pittsworth makes for tough reading. Now, following the sentencing of Anthony's former teacher, Graeme McNeil, who helped dispose of the body, revelations in this paper that McNeil was a Ku Klux Klan member have put local organ The Toowoomba Chronicle on the defensive. The paper, which says it has had the KKK information since July 2007, has accused "southern media" (by which they mean The Australian, which is a bit rough given the story is from our illustrious Brisbane bureau) of beating up the story. Apparently we've depicted Pittsworth as a hillbilly town stuffed to the outskirts with racists. This is rejected with pleasing firmness in one story: "Prominent Pittsworth personality Penny McKinlay said there was no racism within the local high school where McNeil taught and the Rowlingson brothers went to school. 'Good God, the deputy principal (Doug Maxwell) saved the life of a Chinese girl (Tamy Ling) from drowning at the pool,' Mrs McKinlay said." Then in a separate story, journalist Peter Hardwick states, "Painting the Darling Downs and Pittsworth in particular as some sort of redneck backwater and a hot bed for KKK activity only adds to the story." Well, yes, we suppose it would, so it was a bit careless of us only to refer to Pittsworth as a "quiet rural community". As Hardwick asks, "But hey, why ruin a sensational story with the truth?" Quite.

Humble pie

TIME for a confession, and it's not a pretty one. Here goes. Strewth has never watched MasterChef. Yes, we know, we know. However, thanks to Woman's Day, we still feel drawn to the apparent spiral of misery among those involved. The magazine's "MasterChef special report" sees them lining up in a quest to out-woe each other. Alas, not everyone can win, as the headlines bear witness: "Skye's sad past"; "The real reason I can't stop crying"; "My drinking problem"; "My dad was ashamed of me"; and the triumphant victor, "I haven't always been this hot!"