The Sketch: Turnbull’s quiet moment as Joyce bites back

Nationals MP Ken O'Dowd. Picture: AAP

Not even token niceties got much of a look-in during yesterday’s question time. Certainly not from Bill Shorten: “Has the Prime Minister suggested to the Deputy Prime Minister that it’s time he resigned?”

It was not a great moment for Malcolm Turnbull’s voice to connect with an inactive microphone, but as his lips moved briefly, confusion fell.

Barely a handful of metres away in the press gallery, where even whispered heckles can hit eardrums with eerie clarity, shoulders were shrugged and quizzical expressions exchanged. It was possibly only the magic of lip-reading that let Hansard record the PM’s answer as “No”.

Not the most resounding endorsement, but at least Joyce looked like he was back on deck. After days spent looking like he’d been exhumed for a coronial inquest, Joyce had regained his larynx and chutzpah, roaring, “The Leader of the Opposition is holding onto his job by the skin of his teeth!”

This brightened Labor MPs, but the faces behind Joyce looked stonier than a Biblical execution.

One of the few breaks from the Joyce-a-thon was Christopher Pyne’s impish enthusiasm for Anthony Albanese’s leadership credentials, invoking the man’s love of beer and sport and music, eventually declaring, “When you blow the trumpet, the member for Grayndler will appear.” If anyone can turn Albo into an amalgam of the Book of Revelations and Animal House, it’s Pyne.

And thus, with the darkest hour done, it was time towards the unlikeliest dawn: Ken O’Dowd, the Nationals backbencher who has been almost whimsically transparent about the need to sort his party’s leadership headache.

Labor’s Jason Clare started it: “My question is to the member for Flynn in his capacity as the chair of the joint standing committee on trade and investment growth … Is the member able to inform the house of the progress of recent inquiries that he’s been leading? Is the member still accepting submissions from interested parties? When does the member expect his efforts to reach their conclusion?”

It was every bit as flimsily transparent as when, during the Julia Gillard era, Julie Bishop would quiz Kevin Rudd about his prospects of returning to Bougainville/Boganville.

Things promptly got bogged down in protests and technicalities, but someone in the government understood there was a risk O’Dowd might speak, and an attendant arrived at his desk with a note.

Then after some finessing by Labor’s Tony Burke, Speaker Tony Smith uttered the magic words: “The question’s in order.”

O’Dowd rose like a giddy sun, casting his rays all about him.

“Thank you for the question, yeah,” he began. “We have received 18 submissions.”

Granted joyous release after days of Joyceful horror, the crowd went wild — including most of the Nats. O’Dowd relished every second: “We start about 8.30 in the morning, if any of youse are out of bed by then. Once we receive all the submissions, we will finalise our report some time before Christmas. Thank you.”

As the cherished saying goes, not all heroes wear a cape.