The Sketch: love is in the air, briefly, for a Huang parliament

Small Business Minister Michael Mccormack on bended knee at Labor benches occupied by Clare O'Neil, Ed Husic and Tim Hammond. Picture; Gary Ramage

Before it flipped the switch to bull and China yesterday, the House of Representatives blossomed briefly with love. Concluding his same-sex marriage speech, Liberal MP Tim Wilson coupled words with action and proposed marriage to his partner Ryan Bolger, who was sitting above in the public gallery, and received an instant “Yes” vote.

It might not be the first time someone has entered the house as a partner and walked out a fiance; it’s just possible the sight of our democracy’s inner workings has previously triggered romantic thoughts among visitors. But it’s certainly the first time a proposal has been launched from the floor of the house.

Come question time, the signs of love sank back into their more characteristic subtlety. “When will the Prime Minister admit he has lost control of his government and lost authority as PM?” inquired Bill Shorten, loudly.

With his eardrums set to filter words the way politicians and small children can, Malcolm Turnbull took this as an opportunity to rejoice at the re-election of Barnaby Joyce, and rejoice even harder at the China-themed travails of Sam Dastyari.

And with Dasher’s name, the name of Huang Xiangmo soon followed. The race was soon on as to which side could more firmly nail to the other a certain guilt by association.

The topic of this one very helpful businessman soon dominated proceedings so entirely, a number of questions arose. Does such a state of affairs constitute a Huang parliament? And if Dasher’s political career is prematurely snuffed out because of his alleged warnings about possible phone-bugging, would it constitute a case of euthanASIO?

Such thoughts were surely pressing upon Christopher Pyne as he gave another of his masterclasses into how to have one’s cake and eat it, too.

“I call him Senator Dastyari,” he said. “Some have been rude enough to call him Sichuan Sam.” Pulled up by Speaker Tony Smith, Pyne innocently replied, “I do withdraw, I just point out how rude it is to call him Sichuan Sam.” Smith indicated the exponential growth of his impatience and Pyne changed tack slightly.

“There is a difference between sweet and sour,” he ventured. Then as Labor’s Richard Marles rose to protest, Pyne even got in some cross-promotion for their TV show. “He is better on Pyne and Marles, Mr Speaker, than he is in the house.” As a political trapeze artist, Pyne is rivalled only by George Christensen.

Amid it all, some fought to keep affection’s warmth alive. Not least Small Business Minister Michael McCormack, who left his pew to visit his Labor neighbours Ed Husic and Tim Hammond and, radiating the ebullience that comes with the portfolio, got down on one knee.