The Sketch: Another blimp on Morrison’s ever-receding re-election horizon

The much-quoted Kelly O’Dwyer in parliament yesterday. Picture: AAP

After the Hindenburg disaster, eyewitnesses gave conflicting ­accounts as to where the trouble began.

Some saw fabric fluttering up near the top tailfin, as if gas were leaking. Some saw the mighty zeppelin’s spine flickering with a dim blue glow, which may or may not have been St Elmo’s fire. Some swore the first flames erupted near the top fin, others said the first ones appeared ahead of the horizontal port fin.

Yesterday, as all eyewitnesses at least agreed Julia Banks was sitting on her new crossbench pew as clear as day, Bill Shorten started question time with the inevitable shot at Scott Morrison.

“Given that his minority government is consumed by division, dysfunction and chaos …” the Opposition Leader said.

The word “rubbish” departed Christopher Pyne’s lips, flickered with hope as it floated across to Labor, and set off an explosion of laughter.

Less mirthfully, Labor continued its quest to learn why Malcolm Turnbull isn’t PM. Given Labor’s record with its own PMs, this seems more like professional ­interest than provocation.

“The former PM lost the support of the Liberal Party partyroom,” replied Morrison, flipping the switch to matter of fact.

Luke Hartsuyker, who has the Zenlike aura of a government MP not contesting the next election, provoked a Michael McCormack oration.

“Life teaches us many lessons,” MickMack began, proceeding from this timely observation as innocently as a ­canary in a Pompeii pet shop.

Tanya Plibersek quizzed Kelly O’Dwyer about her much-quoted secret speech to colleagues about perceptions of her party as a hotbed of “homophobic, anti-women climate change deniers”.

After a great many words from O’Dwyer, Plibersek applied the handbrake.

“The minister still hasn’t told us if she agrees with herself,” she said.

“She’s taking it on notice,” one of Plibersek’s colleagues ventured.

Morrison tried the knuckledusters.

“The leader of the Labor Party is the most swaggering arrogant sort of leader at the moment, Mr Speaker. He thinks it’s all done,” he said as his lost MP chatted conspicuously and happily with her new neighbours.

“The hubris that is coming from the other side of the chamber is quite extraordinary, Mr Speaker. Very, very cocky.”

Rumbles would continue through the afternoon, among them the same Sydney branch of the Liberal Party that called for Turnbull’s expulsion cheekily announcing an event starring Tony Abbott and Make the Liberal Party Great Again author John Ruddick.

But for now there was one glimmer of brightness: Pyne and McCormack putting their arms around each other and Pyne beaming: “We’re a team.”

Had it been anyone else, one might have felt an echo of August when Morrison put his arm around Turnbull.

But it was Pyne, whose happiness transcends such earthly ­matters.

The same could not be said for his colleagues, who dispersed in a glum haze, possibly gripped by the sobering thought it was only Tuesday. Oh the humanity.