Clive Palmer was in the house, counting out his money

JOB ID : PD595938 Tight times for Clive Palmer as he counts a few dollars during Question Time in the House of Representatives in Parliament House Canberra. Photo by Gary Ramage

Like a rare migratory bird touching down in the local swamp, Clive Palmer always creates a special frisson in the chamber when he graces question time.

And so it was yesterday, the member for Fairfax taking his perch for the first QT of the year, all set to remind everyone a picture is worth a thousand bellowed words.

But first he got to experience question time at its most dignified, as both sides moved through the rollcall of the recent political dead, including long-serving Liberal MP Jim Carlton. (There was a bit of a hiccup during the condolence speeches when Carlton’s successor in the seat of Mackellar, a clearly upset Bronwyn Bishop, was overlooked. A note was dispatched to Speaker Tony Smith and Bishop spoke on indulgence. Amid her emotion, she revealed Carlton’s last words to his wife, Di, were: “Don’t forget to pick up the roast.”)

Once that was done, the handbrake was off and the tumult on. Amid it all sat the member for Fairfax. As if overcome by a wave of goodwill to photographic editors desperate for fresh ways of ­illustrating stories about his ailing businesses and their thoughtful donations to his party, he pulled out his wallet. And from his wallet he pulled a modest wad of cash — a tenner, a couple of fivers and a $20 note — which he fingered tenderly, almost wistfully.

Bean-counting aside, Palmer tried striking a blow for gender equality. Coming in via a mention of Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau, he quizzed Malcolm Turnbull: “I don’t accept that merit is not distributed equally — will the government support gender equality in cabinet with each gender entitled to a minimum of 40 per cent representation?”

His tie, which extended 60 per cent of the way down his shirt, may have been for symbolic emphasis.

The PM never did throw the switch to sparkling — the words “most exciting” didn’t even leave his lips in question time — but he did allow himself a moment of fun: “All of us, I believe, would like to see more women in this parliament. … Perhaps the future Palmer government could aspire to equal representation of men and women.”

Then it was back to business as usual. Tony Abbott studiously made notes, Labor MPs enthusiastically ignored the “no props” rule, and there was a lot more shouting. Amid the din sat the freshly arrived Trent Zimmerman, Joe Hockey’s replacement in North Sydney, wearing an expression that could possibly have been interpreted as “Have I made a terrible mistake?”

The closing acts included opposition legal affairs spokesman Mark Dreyfus continuing his prosecution of the now backbenched Mal Brough, and a wander across the vocal plain that is an answer from Territories Minister Paul Fletcher.

As government whip Ewen Jones strode out, he glanced up at the press gallery. “First day,” he murmured, shaking his head.