John Laws, Australia’s most vocal ‘mongrel’, farewelled in style with state funeral in Sydney
John Laws, the last of the loud, brash and bold voices in the media, signs off with a celebrity and star-studded memorial full of pomp, ego, applause and laughter.
Imagine Donald Trump going up against John Laws?
You think “Golden Tonsils” would have tolerated some of the often incoherent rhetoric the US President serves to the media?
He would cut him down, cut to the chase and end the interview before the first ad break.
You know what I mean.
Alas, the king is dead and sadly so too are the halcyon years of radio. Laws’ final show – a grand state funeral – wrapped on Wednesday at St Andrew’s Cathedral in Sydney. His famous golden microphone took pride of place at the foot of his casket as former prime minister John Howard, NSW Premier Chris Minns, broadcaster Ben Fordham, Olympian Dawn Fraser, Nationals MP Barnaby Joyce and high-profile NSW Liberal MP Kellie Sloane took their seats.
It’s a long way from Papua New Guinea, from where he and his family were evacuated during World War II … even further when you consider he battled and survived two bouts of polio and was a jackaroo out west after leaving school at 15.
Radio was never his aim when he landed his first gig in 1953. He was no journalist; he saw himself – until the end – as an entertainer and performer.
Who could forget one of his last memorial interviews on the ABC’s 7.30 program in 2012. “Did you enjoy it?” he asked then host Leigh Sales after what shaped up to be a combative discussion about his frenemy Alan Jones.
“I did enjoy it, did you?” Sales, looking shocked, giggled.
“Every minute,” he smirked as he raised his bourbon and Coke to the camera.
Long live big, bold unapologetic personalities with legitimate talent and nuance.
You think Lawsy would ever need a day or two off air for some “self-care” to cope with anonymous social media trolls spewing hate about him?
He’d come back harder, louder and more determined to succeed.
The mongrel in him was strong … surprising for a man who had a chauffeur and a Rolls-Royce.
“We heard John’s voice in the everyday. In our kitchens, our cars, our offices, even in our hospital beds,” the Reverend Michael Jensen said during his sermon. “It’s a long way from Woolloomooloo to Walgett, but John spoke Walgett fluently,”
Yet Laws was benched a few times because of some not so insignificant scandals. Contempt of court findings and other run-ins with the law regarding homophobic comments in the early 2000s to name a few. There was also the 1999 cash for comment inquiry that noted he failed to disclose his sponsorship agreements.
“My last conversation with John, in fact, my last couple of conversations, were about a project of mine that he showed great interest in. Nuremberg. In theatres, December 4 – I’m sure you can see what I did there,” actor Russell Crowe joked, plugging his latest movie as he delivered a stirring eulogy.
“I can probably quite confidently say we hardly ever agreed on anything. From bike lanes to politics, we were quite often on opposite sides of any issue. However, we did agree we liked each other’s company and our different perspectives never stopped us from making each other laugh,” he said.
Sixteen prime ministers and too many premiers and leaders to recall, celebrities and everyday Australians – Laws courted, charmed and charred them throughout his 71-year broadcast career. His show required 24 phone lines and was networked to more than 100 stations across the country.
Former prime minister Paul Keating said if you want to talk to Australians, you have to talk to John Laws after his trademark opening “Hello world” as Herb Alpert’s Tijuana Brass’s El Presidente faded out, as it did again on Wednesday as his farewell commenced.
His detractors – and there are, and were, many – were abhorred by his “invective-laden opinion”, according to Crowe.
“The truth was revealed in a differing opinion. Believe in a cause but question its structure. Platform the voiceless and let them be heard. Unbraid a protagonist, but make room for them at his table. That was his forte”. And also the law of Laws on air and off as Crowe – his friend and neighbour – said.
No nonsense, no prisoners, minimal apologies and a superior olfactory sense to detect excrement, Laws was one of a kind. Who else could get away with gifting a one-year-old a bottle of Wild Turkey, as he did for Crowe’s son Charlie.
In the tapestry of this country’s media landscape, Laws was one of the original patterns others tried to emulate with varying degrees of success.
Yet the world has changed and corporations would now rather cancel something risky or rowdy than support it as an additional to a diverse culture.
Laws’ ego was mighty, his legacy indisputable, his audacity and bravery while broadcasting unmatched.
Love him or loathe him, personalities of his ilk are now endangered in a world that is feeling increasingly beige, fake and inauthentic.
The show’s over and if you can’t be real, at least, as Laws always signed off with, “be kind to each other”.
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