Australia’s Olympic uniform is Bland, boring and oh so predictable

Australian athletes (L-R) Benedere Oboya (400m), Safwan Khali (taekwondo) and Jessica Fox (canoe slalom) model the Australian 2020 Tokyo Olympic Games Opening Ceremony Uniform in Sydney. Picture: Matt King/Getty Images

It’s a depressingly common scenario, even for an event that comes around every four years.

The Australian Olympic team’s uniforms, the eighth by Sportscraft, were unveiled in Sydney on Tuesday, and once again the outcome won’t be winning any gold.

Our athletes deserve to look like Australia’s best and finest, not like they’ve been working as activities co-ordinators on a mid-budget cruise liner.

For a country that is now, finally, celebrated globally for its fashion, surely we can have something contemporary that speaks to our landscape, flora, personality and culture.

Where is our national identity in all of this, some green and gold aside?

On the activewear front, I’m sure PE Nation or The Upside would be happy to take a call.

If a creative print is required, how about a collaboration with Zimmermann, Romance Was Born, Ken Done or the artists at Babbarra Women’s Centre?

Say what you like about the Mambo closing ceremony outfits of 2000, but at least they were colourful and irreverent.

And while we’ve moved on from 1984’s koalas and emus, there was no question about where our team was from.

This year, a global audience will see something as bland and generic as supermarket white sliced bread, and it should be much tastier.