Off the fence and into the garden party: I think I’ve become a monarchist

A portrait of Queen Elizabeth II is displayed as a tribute in the window of a department store on September 15, 2022 in London, United Kingdom. Queen Elizabeth II is lying in state at Westminster Hall until the morning of her funeral to allow members of the public to pay their last respects. (Photo by Carl Court/Getty Images)

My earliest memories of the British royal family involve the wedding of Charles and Diana, and of reading The Secret Diary of Adrian Mole. A strange combination perhaps but, as I cast my mind back, those two things speak loudest of the time when I first became aware really of the monarchy. To my life as a kid growing up in suburban Australia and as a factor in the broader, emerging world around me.

Even after graduating from teen lit to what was then the edgy, anti-establishment-lite humour of Ben Elton’s The Young Ones, I never bought into an anti-royal rhetoric. I was never Rick or Vyvyan. For the diehards among us, I was more like Miss Money-­Sterling from Footlights College, Oxbridge, in the Bambi episode.

What I’m saying is, I never hated or resented the royals for being born royal.

I never thought it was bad, but neither did I think it especially enviable a thing to be a part of.

Even after the marriage and subsequent divorce of Charles and Diana. Even after Diana’s terrible death. Where were you when you heard the news? It’s a question we all ask one another at some point. Me? I was having lunch with mates on a Sunday at an Italian joint in Subiaco. I left our table to go to the bathroom; when I came back, everyone was in shock.

But even then, when the world turned against the royals and blamed the Firm, at least in part, for the demise of the People’s Princess, I remained wildly, steadfastly, passionately indifferent. If it isn’t broken, leave it alone.

That is until last weekend. I can’t pick one thing about Queen Elizabeth II that made me an admirer, and I can’t say it was instant either. But waking up to find out she’d passed away, I felt an unexpected sadness. A deeper sense of loss than I was entitled to feel.

This surprised me greatly and in subsequent days I found I was far from alone in that regard. Surprising, too, is the fact that the Queen’s death and the tawdry, classless response to it from some of Australia’s most strident republicans has, I think, moved my place of residence from the fence to the garden party. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I think I’ve become a monarchist.

In the same way that the absurdities and extremes of radical gender ideology have turned me into an old school feminist, the way that many so-called progressives responded to the death of the Queen has caused me to look at her reign and her legacy through a different lens. Less indifferent, more in awe of this incredible woman, a once-in-a-generation woman. Like Shakespeare’s Hermia, the Queen was small in stature but fierce. Formidable.

She was an accidental Queen, wearing the crown because her uncle ran away from his responsibility, and her own father died ­trying to do the job he wasn’t born for.

But she ruled with a servant’s heart, with great sacrifice of spirit and a steely resolve and steadfast faith. She is the one all women can look up to as a role model.

I mean, she worked two days up until she died. An English friend of mine is convinced the Queen’s sense of duty kept her going until she saw Britain safely in the hands of new Prime Minister Liz Truss. I’d believe that.

I’ve paid only passing interest to the Australian Republic Movement, for two main reasons. Firstly, they’ve never been able to present anything that even remotely resembles a workable alternative. Second, it seems to be in the hands of a successive bunch of drongos who talk in circles about stuff everyday Australians don’t have time to worry about. It’s an elite agenda dressed up as the people’s cause.

And sorry to be the one to break it to them, but Australia can barely afford the cost of it. We’re trillions in debt and that’s not going to pay itself back.

I look at our system of government and while it’s imperfect, as all are, it’s the most stable, safe functioning democracy on earth. It will trigger the brokens out there who may read this, but part of our stability lies in our ties with the monarchy. I’ve laughed hard in recent days at all the fools with no basic understanding of modern civics, moaning about how the British royals “control” Australia. Truly, one must get a grip.

Elizabeth II was a remarkable woman who led her people through the most extraordinary of times. Her legacy is powerful. It speaks now and will do so for many years to come.

In the meantime, God save the King.