Empathy missing as we need it most in this pandemic

Many Victorians see this constant urging to hurry up and open up as frightening.

Victorian Premier Daniel Andrews departs the daily COVID update earlier this week. Picture: NCA NewsWire / Andrew Henshaw

Emotional intelligence quotient. It is a capability that we all need now, more than ever — and this is coming from someone with the emotional IQ of a gnat.

Importantly, urgent development of emotional IQ is required in the federal Coalition ranks. A quick crash course is needed.

Emotional IQ is self- and social awareness, the ability to use emotional information to guide thinking and behaviour, and recognise the impact of words and actions on the feelings of others.

A politician with a high emotional IQ, for instance, would not go on television every day to angrily tell Victorians they should hurry up and open their economy. They would not give Victorians in lockdown the message that their current sacrifices are ridiculously unnecessary, and all due to the inexplicable whims of a deranged leader. They wouldn’t infer that if only they had elected a different government a couple of years ago, their pain and loss would have been avoided.

The point here isn’t about what it is true, or right. The point is about the impact of a set of messages on people in a certain set of circumstances and frame of mind, and — if votes count — the blowback that will come when those people eventually get up off the mat.

Many Victorians see this constant urging to hurry up and open up as frightening. The constant interjections almost look like a politically motivated attempt to sabotage our hard work and sacrifice to bring the virus under control. We are very aware of what will happen if we open too soon.

Those with emotional IQ possess empathy. Empathy does not mean being soft, or agreeing with people, but it does mean working hard to understand how they might think and feel, before speaking.

A politician with empathy would understand that vociferous criticism of the Victorian response to the pandemic simply elevates fear and anxiety in people living in Victoria, people who are already scared and suffering, and who — importantly — have no choice but to rely on the current leadership to get through a crisis.

A politician with emotional IQ would understand that now is not the time to broadcast their low opinion of the Victorian Premier, because the impact of their words on people in a certain set of circumstances is going to be quite harmful on those people.

The politician would also understand that, when the next federal election comes, voters will remember being made to feel so bad in their hour of need. Victorians feel isolated and marginalised; criticism of our government and systems by people interstate simply has the effect of further alienating us, and causes resentment. This resentment will translate into a loss of support at the ballot box.

Those with high emotional IQ don’t judge and label and leap on the chance to prove their own opinions right. Instead, hard work goes into trying to see things through the eyes of others.

Individuals with high emotional IQ have the ability to control their own emotions and opinions, refrain from harsh criticism, and instead offer constructive feedback.

Politicians with high emotional IQ wouldn’t criticise the Victorian contact tracing team in public, and constantly compare them with the “gold standard” team in NSW. A politician with empathy would anticipate the hurt and humiliation that would flow from these statements to people — voters — who get up every morning, go to work, and try their best all day, to claw the state, and thus the nation, back to a place where the virus is brought under control.

Those with high emotional IQ have the tendency to praise and try to connect on common ground. This doesn’t mean behaving like a craven sycophant, and seeking nakedly transactional relationships. It is far more genuine than that — and yes, people can tell the difference.

Up until now, politics has been all about the economy. Management of the economy, jobs, balancing budgets, delivering services and so on. Yet while the economy is important, public health takes a higher priority.

All the riches in the world cannot buy good health, and if you don’t have your health, you have nothing. This is why health comes first, the economy comes second, and the way voters feel about the health of the society they live in is very important too.

Once, the federal government used to be the focus for all of us. Now, it is basically just the nation’s ATM. It is the leaders of the states and territories who make the decisions that affect our lives. These decisions are local decisions for local voters, and voters don’t like to see the Prime Minister criticising their Premier.

When the times change, the best people change with them. The next time a federal politician says something about Victoria, it should be to praise the state, thank the people and acknowledge their leadership.

Together, Victorians brought this state back from the brink. We have made extraordinary sacrifices and delivered an incredible result. We did it for us, and we did it for the rest of the country too. Think of how badly it might have turned out if we had failed, and be thankful.