‘Are you seriously asking me to do that?’: Katy Gallagher’s Lowe blow

‘Are you seriously asking me to do that?’ ... Labor senator Katy Gallagher. Picture: AAP

“Are you seriously asking me to do that?” Labor senator Katy Gallagher said with a laugh, at the start of the COVID-19 inquiry on Thursday.

The photographers and camera crew tasked with shooting the virtual appearance of Reserve Bank of Australia boss Philip Lowe had asked Gallagher, as committee chairwoman, to kindly ask the banker to reposition his camera. No one is exempt from technological follies, even secure government systems.

Shadow Minister for Finance Katy Gallagher (right) questions Reserve Bank of Australia Governor Philip Lowe as he appears by video link at the Senate Inquiry into COVID-19. Picture: AAP

“Governor Lowe, I ask this in the most humblest of ways, but is there a way you could tilt your camera down a bit better. It’s a request from the media,” Gallagher inquired. Lowe humbly obliged.

“My apologies for having to start that way,” Gallagher said as the senators engaged in a bit of background banter.

“He wins the background picture as well,” Centre Alliance’s Rex Patrick said of Lowe’s office.

“I have some fantastic Aboriginal art from Arnhem Land,” Lowe explained of the poles behind him.

“Another way of interpreting that is Rex’s background is really boring,” Greens senator Peter Whish-Wilson concluded.

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Vicious news cycle

Wheelie terrible news for political MAMILs (middle-aged men in Lycra) and their fans. The annual Pollie Pedal has been canned cause of coronavirus.

The 1000km, eight-day cycle was scheduled to start and finish in the Canberra Bubble™, raising funds for charity Soldier On.

Former prime minister Tony Abbott (centre) joins MP Andrew Wallace (left) on last year’s Pollie Pedal. Picture: File

Energy Minister Angus Taylor was set to head up the ride this year, with usual suspects Kevin Andrews and Tony Abbott in the pack.

Tony Abbott sports that famous ‘colsi’ at the Family Hotel in Cootamandra during the 2016 Pollie Pedal. Picture: Adam Yip

The former prime minister tended to use the pilgrimage as a pseudo campaign, offering up daily doorstops and debuting some suspicious sartorial selections. During a boozy karaoke night at Cootamundra’s Family Hotel in 2016, Abbott was snapped in a “colsi” (COLlared SInglet).

This year’s cycle could have offered a helping hand to the Coalition in Eden-Monaro. Last year, the 32 riders raised $46,371.

As for Andrews, the author of Great Rivalries: Cycling and the Story of Italy has been keeping fit during the pandemic. His bike featured prominently in the background of his virtual appearance to chair Wednesday’s joint committee on Australia's family law system.

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Barre association

Some delayed correspondence. Cast your mind back to the beginning of this pandemic — March 24 to be precise — when Scott Morrison announced exercise restrictions and stumbled over the word barre.

Quoth the Prime Minister: “Community and recreation centres, health clubs, fitness centres, yoga, barre — I hope I’ve pronounced that correctly, I might need some help with that. I’m not quite sure what that is, to be honest, but B-A-R-R-E for those who are looking for the specific definition.”

Shay Stafford.

Shay Stafford, owner and operator of Xtend Barre in Stones Corner, Brisbane, was inspired to write to Morrison: “Thank you for the call-out for ‘barre’ in last night’s media conference. No, you didn’t pronounce it correctly: it’s barre, as in ‘bar’. But that’s OK. Lots of people stumble over that. Clearly you didn’t do ballet lessons as a kid … Now that you’ve admitted — in the most public forum imaginable — that your knowledge of one of Australia’s fastest-growing fitness disciplines is not quite up to scratch, can I take this opportunity to invite you — and Jenny if she’s keen — to take part in one of the online classes we are now offering our clients.”

Stafford has been running classes via Zoom for her 800-strong client base to keep her business afloat and pay her staff, before restrictions relax in July. Her letter continues: “I’d be very happy to stage a short, five-minute session for you and the national cabinet … the offer is sincere … I promise I’ll make it easy. And I promise you won’t have to wear tights.” There’s an image that won’t leave you soon!

Shay Stafford stretches at her Xtend Barre business in the Brisbane suburb of Stones Corner. Picture: Lyndon Mechielsen

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Let it go

Instead of taking up the Lycra offer, it appears the Prime Minister has leaned in to his love of puzzles. Morrison posted a smiling snap to Instagram of himself and Nationals leader Michael McCormack attempting a Disney Princess puzzle. “Abbey and Lily left this jigsaw puzzle unfinished in Canberra. So last night when the Deputy PM was over, we gave it a go after dinner,” Morrison said.

Yes, this really is a picture of Deputy PM Michael McCormack and Prime Minister Scott Morrison working on a DIsney princess puzzle.

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Final racquet

Former world No 1 Roger Federer filmed a farewell message to another No 1, albeit in the smaller and less athletic field of Sydney radio.

“Alan, it’s Roger here. I just wanted to wish you all the very best for what’s to come,” the tennis legend said to outgoing shock jock Alan Jones.

“And many congratulations on an amazing 35-year career in the media business. Take care and all the best.”

The world’s fastest man, Usain Bolt, also sent a sayonara ahead of Jones hanging up his headphones on Friday: “I just want to say congratulations on retiring at the top of your game.”

Alan Jones (right) with his successor, Ben Fordham. Picture: Jonathan Ng

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