Strewth: in a Swiss spot

Someone who said they wouldn’t attend Davos seems to have changed his mind.

Familiar faces, far-off places.

Despite being the only ski resort that comes close to sharing a name with a Doctor Who character, Davos doesn’t sound like such a hit this year. Indeed, this august organ reported yesterday that many of Australia’s chief executives have ditched the annual World Economic Forum, with not even Trade Minister Steve Ciobo and Finance Minister Mathias Cormann enough of a drawcard to lure them to this rarefied corner of Switzerland. Amid the rollcall of alleged non-attendance was Westpac chief Brian Hartzer, who we were informed had “shied away from following in the footsteps of his predecessor Gail Kelly, who attended Davos last year”. Going by this fresh photo from Davos, Cormann has done well to find such a convincing Hartzer look-alike, complete with even a name tag that is a dead ringer for Hartzer’s. In fact, we’ll go out on a limb and suggest it in fact just may be Hartzer.

Held back by leak

Elsewhere in the northern hemisphere, Liberal MP Andrew Hastie has taken his small son Jonathan for his first meeting with his American cousins. “All self-funded!” Hastie told Strewth with understandable urgency. While that went well, it seems there was a missed opportunity: “I flew with 3 Doors Down from Nashville to Washington, DC, today and waited at baggage with them for 20 minutes. I was too embarrassed to ask who they were.” It turns out 3 Doors Down — a rock band described by The Independent as “a budget Nickelback”, which should meet with the approval of prominent Washington-based Nickelback fan Joe Hockey — is playing at Donald Trump’s inauguration. Hastie, however, does have an explanation for this burst of shyness: “In fairness, my little man’s nappy had leaked on to me and I had a wet patch.”

Ready for action

One musical act at the inauguration Strewth would be keen to catch is the DC Fire Department Emerald Society Pipes and Drums, which prefaces one of its music videos with the theory: “As long as there are bagpipers there will be free people.” Yet despite the presence of such a civilising force, not every media group is confident about the day. The International News Safety Institute has noted that one of its members has given its journos riot kits. Whether they’ll need them against Trump haters or Trump fans is less clear.

Checking the shelf life

With the Sussan Ley thing hopefully behind him, Malcolm Turnbull announced his reshuffle, an event that elicited a range of reactions, not least this proud opening from new Health Minister Greg Hunt: “Health touches the lives of every Australian. It is essential that people can see a doctor when they need to and have medicine when they are not well.” Quite so. But there’s just no shaking the vibe. Once Turnbull had made his announcement, the Q&A session kicked off with a journo asking: “Will this ministry last the year?”

Over here, overlooked

Following the reshuffle, a sadness emanated from Tasmania, rolling across Bass Strait like a sombre fog. “The Ministry is appointed at the sole discretion of the Prime Minister,” began Eric Abetz’s missive about missing out again. “While it is deeply disappointing that there will be a continuation of a situation where there is no Tasmanian minister …” Of course, Tasmania did have a minister, Richard Colbeck, but lateral thinkers in his party decided the best thing to do was to bump him down the Senate ticket to an unwinnable slot. In contrast to, say, the disappointed Abetz, who got the top spot. His typing fingers soldiered bravely on: “The Tasmanian Liberal Senate Team will continue to be vocal representatives within the government to deliver for our state.” Better luck next time.

Spare the Rod

The almost Homeric odyssey of Rod Culleton is continuing with a fundraiser at gofundme.com/supportsenatorculleton, set up to help him “fund the solicitor’s fees and other claims as he fights to protect the rights of all Australians”. By last night, it was $98,170 short of its $100,000 goal. You know what to do.

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