Strewth: Curse on this place

Following Wednesday night’s fisticuffs and the blood on Pauline Hanson’s office door, we find ourselves thinking of Danny Nalliah.

Casting spells; was Danny Nalliah on to something? Picture: Jake Nowakowski

Following Wednesday night’s fisticuffs between Pauline Hanson right-hand man James Ashby and One Nation apostate Brian Burston, and the eerily biblical touch of blood daubed on Hanson’s office door, we find ourselves thinking of Danny Nalliah. It was in October 2009 that a “black mass altar” was supposedly discovered on Canberra’s Mount Ainslie, and the Catch the Fire Ministries pastor laid the blame at the feet of witches and Satan. (“Witches have better things to do,” huffed the Pagan Awareness Network, as you’d expect, but Satan kept his silence.) Explained Nalliah: “The type of altar discovered on Mount Ainslie pointed to a black mass and the work of dark forces wanting to cast spells on Australia and federal parliament. These days people don’t think the devil is real, but we have seen the bad effects of the spiritual being known as Satan and we believe there is a spiritual fight over the nation of Australia being fought in the heavens.” Sure, people scoffed at the time, but think about everything that’s happened in federal politics since 2009 and, well, you have to wonder.

Gentle warm-up act

As the denizens of Parliament House timorously weigh up whether it’s safe to dine out in the building’s various eateries, let’s pop back to the relative innocence of November 2016, when Ashby chucked a phone at Margaret Menzel, chief of staff to then One Nation senator Rod Culleton, during an argument over a proposed Facebook
live-stream. As we reported then, “According to Menzel, the ensuing argument became personal and repetitive, until Ashby ‘completely lost the plot’ and threw the phone in her direction. Menzel was not hit by the phone. ‘My reflexes are pretty good for an old chick,’ she said.” Jump forward to yesterday: Hanson left town early, Ashby was exiled from Parliament House, and Burston announced his own vague finding: “Whilst I do not recall the incident of blood on the door, I now have come to the conclusion that it was myself, and I seriously apologise for that action.” Somewhere, Nalliah is nodding slowly but sadly.

A bit of nuance

On Sky News, various government figures tried to make the case over the Nauru/Manus medivac bill, giving various degrees of what Scott Morrison might refer to as Canberra-bubble nuance. But Sky News wasn’t quite in the mood. Part-way through his interview with Deputy PM Michael McCormack, presenter Kieran Gilbert suggested: “You’ve got to be factual.” The Sky News caption writer also had a go: “Michael McCormack falsely claims rapists can come to Australia under the new legislation.” But not for Labor senator Doug Cameron such a gentle approach when discussing ScoMo. Instead he took the rockily scenic route, stopping in at favoured Cameronian attractions such as “misleading”, “incompetent”, “desperate” (a perfect showcase for those North Lanarkshire vowels and rolling r), “disgrace” (ditto), “lying”, and “lost the plot”. On Radio National, meanwhile, Christopher Pyne, took a less-is-more approach: “We’re all going back to the horror of the Labor Party government.”

Spot the difference

Sometimes pollies carry on as though they misheard a reporter’s question, giving an “answer” that bears a much stronger relationship to what the pollie wants to talk about than to the words that left the reporter’s lips. But sometimes they actually do mishear, with variable results. Exhibit A: NSW Transport Minister Andrew Constance during a visit to Dubbo yesterday with Deputy Premier John Barilaro to talk about trains. Under the watchful eye of local member Troy Grant, all went as per usual until an ABC reporter asked about mobile phone black spots. Constance seized his chance, nudging aside Barilaro and started on about traffic black spots. Oblivious to the bemusement around him, he bypassed phones altogether and got stuck into Opposition Leader Michael Daley for not getting the roads sorted when he was the minister. That’s a portfolio Daley hasn’t held since September 2009, and Constance’s party has been in power since, ooh, March 2011 — but surely worth a shot all the same. (No, we don’t know how the mobile phone story panned out.)

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