Strewth: Braking news, Bill Shorten and Prince Harry

It might still be the wet season, but that’s no excuse for the tropical torpor to have infected the ABC’s Darwin bureau.

It might still be the wet season in the Top End, but that’s no excuse for the tropical torpor that appears to have infected the ABC’s Darwin bureau. Strewth understands one of their local journosencountered Matthew Gardiner, the former NT Labor Party president, in Singapore when heading back to Darwin from holidays. Gardiner has just reappeared in the country after wandering off on a magical mystery tour of the Middle East that has excited the interest of the AFP. The reporter filed — but only after returning home, ABC flaks admit. Nothing like that good old public-sector work ethic. And the delay meant Gardiner got back in the country without being bothered by pesky cameras.

Follow the money

Darwin is a small place and there are longstanding fears that the local journos and politicos are always a little too friendly. The Gardiner matter has done nothing to assuage them. All sorts of questions have been raised by the former soldier’s sojourn in a strife zone. Opposition Leader Bill Shorten was playing them with a very straight bat yesterday. “It’s illegal for Australians to support armed groups in northern Iraq and Syria,” he said. “But when it comes to individual cases, I’m not going to pre-empt the work of the police. Politicians shouldn’t be getting involved with the actual matters of a police investigation. We’ll leave that to the proper authorities.” But the ABC appears to consider Gardiner’s trip quite the ripping yarn, a true boy’s own adventure — and one worth taking to the bank. “Darwin man Matthew Gardiner suspected of helping Kurdish forces fighting Islamic State militants could be paid thousands of dollars to tell his story,” it said in a breathless report on Monday. “As debate rages on social media as to whether Gardiner was right to have helped Kurdish groups, former Today Tonight supervising producer and Seven Network news director Steve Carey said Gardiner’s story could be worth big money. ‘There are plenty of precedents for people getting paid $50,000 to $250,000,’ Carey said.” The idea of cold cash appears to have blinded the ABC to trickier questions surrounding Gardiner’s activities.

Hair to the throne

Also dealing with Darwin manners and mores is Prince Harry, who’s off on patrol with the long range reconnaissance unit NORFORCE, although it's the dress uniform he wore in Canberra on Monday that has become a matter of controversy. The Prince was spotted sporting what looked a charity wristband at the War Memorial, accessorising that would normally drive any regimental sergeant major into paroxysms of rage. One old squarebasher says to Strewth photos suggest it contains, among other words, the phrases “I am thin” and “of my pate”. Your columnist concurs. Could it be some sort of awareness-raiser for sufferers from the male hair patterns all too obviously affected Harry’s grandfather the Duke of Edinburgh, uncle Prince Edward and elder sibling William?

Canberra leaks

Security might be getting tighter and tighter at Parliament House in Canberra but nothing, it appears, can stop the rain from getting in. It started pelting cats and dogs in the capital yesterday — and lo and behold the old grey rubbish bins appeared in their usual strategic points on the parquetry of the Members Hall.

Charm offensive

Also leaking out in Canberra are claims Liberal Democrat Senator David Leyonhjelm may have made some less than gallant remarks about former PM Julia Gillard in a comments thread on the libertarian Catallaxy blog back when she occupied the Lodge. “Every dog has its day, including mangy dogs like Gillard,” he allegedly wrote. “History won’t remember her for the carbon tax but for leading Labor to the biggest defeat ever.” The Senator’s response? “I don’t remember it but I don’t give a f--- if I did,” a laconic Leyonhjelm told Fairfax fusspots. “Get real, Australians are rude about their elected politicians,” he continued, sagely adding “The (Tony) Abbott-hating industry is massive.”

Fair warning

All of which serves as the perfect introduction to the best sign spotted so far in the lead-up to the British general election next month, a home-printed effort on a genteel-looking front door that reads “If you shove another Labour leaflet through my door it will be going up your arse”. Beneath, in smaller letters, are the words “Have a pleasant day”.

Bigger kids

And to close, in a bold change of career former editor in chief of parenting site Kidspot Alex Brooks has been appointed to head up the ALP’s online publishing venture, the Labor Herald. Does this mean the party’s much vaunted year of ideas will produce nothing but motherhood statements?

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