Bill Shorten’s salad day

We like to think Bill Shorten was channelling Thatcher when he held a press conference in front of a ‘vegetables’ sign.

Opposition Leader Bill Shorten at Kings Meadows Woolworths with local member Ross Hart and Labor Senator Helen Polley. Picture: Nick Clark

For those who never crossed paths with it, Spitting Image was a British TV show in which politicians were lampooned with puppets that managed to be at once lovingly yet cruelly crafted. One sketch featured Margaret Thatcher at a restaurant with her cabinet. Having opted for steak, the Iron Lady is asked by the waitress, “And what about the vegetables?” She glances around at her ministers and says, “Oh, they’ll have the same as me.” We like to think Bill Shorten was channelling Thatcher yesterday when he held a press conference in a Launceston Woolworths just in front of the “vegetables” sign. (Shorten’s advancers can still give themselves a pat on the back; if he’d been standing in front of the “pressed smallgoods” sign, it would have only led to Newspoll-based gags.) But even if the setting was a bit different to usual, his performance was true to form:

Journo: “Mr Shorten, what do you hope is achieved at COAG this week?”

Shorten: “Well, I’m not the PM …”

For good measure, he described Tony Abbott as “very unusual”. He didn’t fondle a convenient onion as he said it, though, so bit of a missed opportunity there.

Matter of deduction

In Sydney, Malcolm Turnbull addressed the Knowledge Nation 100 lunch (sponsored by this august organ), demonstrating the perhaps unparalleled malleability of a certain phrase: “It has never been a more exciting time to be an Australian — and with the arrival of Paul Whittaker as editor-in-chief, it’s never been more exciting to be at The Australian.” And then he spoke. At the end of it, our learned colleague Paul Kelly observed, “I’ve never heard an Australian prime minister talk before in this fashion.” So who should ask the first question but the University of Western Australia’s Nobel laureate Barry Marshall: “I’d like to see more resources into the taxation department so people who are donating money to companies or institutions can get a reading before they start on whether it’s tax deductible. …” And on at some length. For all of Turnbull’s reputation for talking like a punctured caramel vat —

smooth but far, far too bountiful — he can play a pretty straight bat sometimes: “It’s pretty easy to determine whether an entity is a deductible gift recipient so that’s actually all available online so it shouldn’t be that hard,” he counselled. But when it’s the most exciting time to be an Australian, why end on a down note? “Perhaps Paul Shetler from the Digital Transformation Office can develop an app you can perhaps scan somebody who’s asking for your donation and it will tell you whether they are a deductible gift recipient!”

Baby steps

One of the big events to look forward to next week is the release of the Mid-Year Economic and Fiscal Outlook. It’s happening far from Canberra in the delightful surrounds of Perth. Word on the street was that this had something to do with the imminent expansion of Finance Minister Mathias Cormann’s family. His office confirmed to Strewth this was the case; a family-friendly workplace. In fact, the baby is officially due the day after MYEFO, so best wishes to the whole tribe, not least Cormann’s wife, Hayley Ross, who of course will be performing the most labour-intensive role.

No thaw here

The sort of people saddened by the end of the Cold War probably felt a twinge of familiar regret when Gina Rinehart invited the media to cover the historic first shipment of iron ore from her Roy Hill project. But fret not — we are assured it doesn’t portend a new era in her relationship with the Fourth Estate, heavens no. On the eve of the trip to Port Hedland, Rinehart issued a press release attacking journalists for their “relentless negativity”. Then it emerged yesterday that she had not invited two of her least favourite outlets, Channel Nine and fellow billionaire Kerry Stokes’s The West Australian newspaper, to cover the event — perhaps even banned them. Apparently she is still fuming over Nine’s airing of the House of Hancock miniseries earlier this year. As for The West, one of the paper’s “relentlessly negative” hacks did manage to sneak into the Roy Hill berth at Port Hedland for the speeches.