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Portsea polo just the place for a political power couple

There was none looking more pukka among the chukkas than Julie Bishop on Saturday.

Julie Bishop with partner David Panton at the Portsea polo on Saturday. Picture: Sarah Matray
Julie Bishop with partner David Panton at the Portsea polo on Saturday. Picture: Sarah Matray

There was none looking more pukka among the chukka set than Julie Bishop when she returned to the polo at Portsea on Saturday. The Foreign Minister, who was a notable no-show last year amid a brouhaha about charging taxpayers for her 2016 travel costs to the A-list event, stressed that this visit was in a private capacity as she and her partner, David Panton, acceded to numerous requests for selfies. Panton particularly gleamed among the A-list crowd, setting himself apart from a sea of blue and beige blazers in an intriguing jacket featuring an old caryard, entitled ‘‘Post Apocalypse Now’’ by designers House of Cannon, the Aussie label run by Annie Cannon-Brookes, wife of Atlassian co-founder and billionaire Mike Cannon-Brookes. And if you fancy J-Bish’s lace shift dress, it’s now selling half-price at just $500 from designer Rachel Gilbert.

Hole lot of strife

While few would describe Portsea as a ‘‘shithole’’, we’d love to hear the Foreign Minister’s thoughts on Donald Trump’s reported put-down. Her predecessor, Bob Carr, currently abroad, shared his views on Twitter — no prizes for guessing which nation he’s referring to: “To West Europeans there’s one real ‘ ... hole’ country. It has extremes of wealth, reckless business, failing schools, lousy infrastructure, rampant gun crime, record of losing wars, gerrymandered congress & a populist leader.” A hat tip to ABC Africa correspondent Sally Sara who tweeted scenes of the continent’s majestic mountains with the caption: “Gotta get some new business cards. ABC #shithole correspondent.”

According to Boris

While his language was undiplomatic to say the least, Trump is not exactly alone as an international figure caught out speaking his mind. He’s up against Boris Johnson, of course, who famously won a poetry competition aimed at Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdogan just weeks before being appointed as Britain’s foreign minister. In case you’ve forgotten: “There was a young fellow from Ankara/ Who was a terrific wankerer/ Till he sowed his wild oats/ With the help of a goat/ But he didn’t even stop to thankera.” Johnson also suggested in 2002 that the Queen loved touring the Commonwealth because she was greeted by “cheering crowds of flag-waving piccaninnies” and that in the Congo, Tony Blair would be met with “watermelon smiles”. He later apologised.

Athlete caught short

As a ‘‘projectionist provocateur’’ yesterday cast images of a grinning poo emoji onto the Trump hotel in Washington DC, emblazoning the building with the words “This place is a shithole”, news spread of an ultra-marathon winner who had been caught skipping laps by hiding in the portaloo. Kelly Agnew, 45, was disqualified from a race in Arizona after he was seen circling back at the start/finish staging area and spending more than seven minutes in a portable toilet before “completing” the lap. He’s been stripped of four previous first-place titles.

Baking mad

Fresh from black-banning us all from using the word ‘‘champagne’’ for a bit of bubbly, the French are out to protect that historic staple — the baguette. President Emmanuel Macron is supporting a campaign to have the French baguette listed as a UNESCO cultural treasure, joining Naples pizza, Belgian beer, Croatian gingerbread, Spanish flamenco and Tibetan opera. “When I see the quality of bread in supermarkets, it is impossible not to get angry,” Dominique Anract, president of the National Confederation of French Patisseries and Bakeries, told food website Atabula. “The bread is frozen, some of it comes from Romania or who knows where, nothing is carried out in accordance of the rules of the art.” A man after the heart of Jeff Kennett, who exposed Coles to a $2.5 million fine when he discovered bread that was advertised as freshly baked in-store had been made in Ireland. Strewth munched her way through far too many Coles’ ‘‘bake at home’’ croissants over the summer — a far cry from the boulangeries of Paris — and with 78 per cent Australian ingredients, we doubt Monsieur Anract would approve.

strewth@theaustralian.com.au

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Original URL: https://www.theaustralian.com.au/commentary/strewth/portsea-polo-just-the-place-for-a-political-power-couple/news-story/2afa696fdb2b53763b294c14afce8d6c