Heavens above: Poetry of Clive Palmer

Once you get a decent Clive Palmer verse in your brain there’s no dislodging it.

When one thinks of Clive Palmer, one tends to think of poetry. (Well, a couple of other things, too, but let’s not allow ourselves to be deflected from our main mission.) Once you get a decent Palmer verse in your brain there’s no dislodging it.

You had us at halo.

Strewth’s personal favourites include: “Take a woman and give her/ Children and a night/ She’ll be the torch/ And you the light”. And: “You always wanted/ what I could not give/I gave you my heart/ But you wanted my soul/ to live with you”. And, of course, our old favourite: “Man of Love/ Is my name/ Man of Love/ Shall remain”. It surpasses anything Gina Rinehart put on a boulder. And yet yesterday when Palmer — as if in answer to a cry from a tormented world — appeared on Twitter as this heavenly vision, it was not to his poetry that our mind turned. Instead we found ourselves quietly singing along to a Beatles melody: “When I find myself in times of trouble/ Clive Palmer comes to me/ Speaking words of wisdom, let it be/ And in my hour of darkness/ he is standing right in front of me/ Speaking words of wisdom, let it be …” And amid it all, Palmer’s words accompanying the photo: “The truth will set you free.”

Once more with feeling

If Google Translate is anything to go by, then the Italian for deja vu is gia visto. This was the gentle sensation that came over us as we read Paul Kelly in The Weekend Australian: “Warning that Australia is now mired in gridlock that destroys any chance of effective government, (Tony) Abbott says Australia ‘increasingly resembles Italy’, facing chronic changes of prime minister and an inability to get things done.” Interesting call from Abbott, but he’s not the first to express it. Here’s our colleague Niki Savva in her column on August 24, 2010: “Arrivederci Australia. Ciao to Italy in the Pacific.” It’s a thought she’s reiterated several times, including one wildly optimistic day in late 2013: “Ciao amici. Australia’s fifth prime minister in less than six years — the unlikely, unpopular yet eminently electable, successfully rebranded Tony Abbott — is charged with ending the soap opera and all the jokes about the Italy of the Pacific.” So it’s nice to see Abbott on a unity ticket with Savva again.

Reap what you cow

Bill Shorten has become the latest to use the expression “cattle growers”. This always leaves us with the vision of succulent young calves ripening in the sun and plucked from the (bo)vine.

Face of change

Very shortly after Gladys Berejiklian changed jobs and became NSW treasurer, our colleague John Feder was on hand to photograph her. When she changed jobs again a few days back and became NSW Premier, who was on hand once again to photograph her again but Feder. Evidently hoping another job change isn’t imminent, Berejiklian told him she hoped she didn’t seem him again for a while. She was joshing. Probably.

Tar for the memories

Alas, the job change fairy also visited NSW education minister Adrian Piccoli. To mark his axing, we recall when he was involved in a project to get more of the kids from the two missions in Walgett, northern NSW, going to school. Strewth reported, “As the announcement said: ‘The community proposed a project constructing bus turnarounds and shelters at Namoi Village and Gingie Reserve to overcome the problem of students not being able to attend school in wet weather because of buses getting bogged’. Getting bogged in the potholed dirt roads out to the missions, that is.

A couple of days ahead of the grand unveiling, Piccoli popped by to have a look — and he saw the vision splendid of the turnaround extended, and at right the everlasting glory of the shelter and brass plaque. All shiny and new, except for the road, which was in what real estate agents would describe as ‘original condition’. It’s possible Piccoli felt no sentimental attachment to the bus-stopping potholes. It’s possible he had some stern words. What’s undisputed is that lo, the road was suddenly tarred. So, to school!”

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