Feel the serenity

You know what they say … factional friends who kumbaya together, stay together.

Susan Templeman.

You know what they say … factional friends who kumbaya together, stay together. Labor Left senator Jenny McAllister and her lower house caucus colleague Susan Templeman have teamed up to purchase 16ha of “paradise” in the NSW Blue Mountains National Park. Could this be a clue to what’s in Anthony Albanese’s soon-to-be-announced climate policy? The politicians and their partners will share ownership with eight other families of the Wentworth Falls property, which was purchased for $771,000 in September through the Project Tableland Environment Trust. Located less than a 20-minute drive from the local village, the rural land was billed by Liberty Property Services as a life-changing “chance to get away from the noise and chaos of modern life and reconnect with nature”. “You and only two neighbours – a family who have lived next door for many years (who you can’t see or hear from your block) and thousands of square kilometres of nature,” Liberty’s listing said. The eco-friendly, off-grid lifestyle is quite the tree change from the rough and tumble of federal politics, and just what the doctor ordered in the lead-up to a stressful election campaign. “My husband and I already live within the Blue Mountains World Heritage Area, but when the chance to join with 10 other families to jointly purchase a large piece of land arose, we were very keen to do it,” Templeman informed Strewth. The Labor member for Macquarie lost her home in the 2013 Blue Mountains bushfires but has rebuilt in Winmalee with her husband, Ron Fuller. Templeman said the new piece of land would be primarily used for camping and conservation … although there are approved DA plans to build a four-bedroom home on the block, with views of the creek that runs through it. “The land has a shed on it,” Templeman said. “Our interest is in managing the land for conservation and recreational use. It will be lovely being able to camp somewhere that is only a short distance from home yet a million miles away.” The first tents were pitched in late October, with Gundungurra man David King performing a smoking ceremony and welcome to country for the families. “Looking forward to many years of camping, hiking and learning about this special place,” McAllister posted on Instagram, with a few pictures of native flowers. The land is the third addition to McAllister’s property portfolio with husband John Graham, a NSW Labor MLC. The couple picked up a four-bedroom unit in inner-Sydney Alexandria earlier this year for $1.9m. The two also own an investment townhouse in Redfern they purchased for $653,000 in 2006.

Minions of the moon

Health Minister Greg Hunt set an early alarm on Sunday to appear on Insiders, the program described by former prime minister Paul Keating as a “kind of peekaboo show for insomniacs”. Things took a turn for the Shakespearean when host David Speers tried to determine whether Australia had agreed to the Glasgow Climate Pact.

Hunt: “We’ve set our target. But what we’ll continue to do is update our projections. But the target has been set.”

Speers: “But this agreement says you’ve got to update the target next year.”

Hunt: “The projections continue to meet and beat the target.”

Speers: “Doesn’t this agreement say … Sorry, I just want to be clear … Australia I assume-”

Hunt: “It reminds me of Prince Hal to Hotspur in Henry IV: I never promised to pay thee, but now that I’m here, I’ll pay thee double. It means under-promise, over-deliver.”

There’s just one catch for Hunt – Hal killed Hotspur.

Greg Hunt.

Shit happens

Extinction Rebellion protesters dumped a large pile of dung on the doorstep of Finance Minister Simon Birmingham’s office on Friday, a surprise statement about the “shit show” that was COP26. Never one to look a gift horse in the rear, Birmo offered it up to green-thumbed Crow-eaters (including his nine and 10-year-old daughters’ tomato and strawberry patch). “Anybody who’s watching in the western suburbs of Adelaide – I don’t like waste so they’re more than welcome to come and help themselves to some garden fertiliser for free from the office this morning,” Birmo told Sky News. In the dying hours of Glasgow, Australia was awarded the “Colossal Fossil” award in a mock ceremony by the Climate Action Network: “The only good thing about Australia being at COP is they have the best coffee at their pavilion.”

It’s academic

The Canberra Bubble™ has the second-most snorers in the world, according to a UK study by bedding company Sleepseekers. The results were based on how many times the topic was Googled over the past 12 months, well before PJK’s review of Insiders and ACT Chief Minister Andrew Barr’s decree to reopen nightclubs: “For the youngsters … dancing is back. Moves Like Jagger will be seen.” The 1.2 million population of Dublin topped the list followed by the 430,000 residents of Canberra. Which seems at odds with “research” by online contact lens retailer Lenstore that ranked our capital in the top cities for having a snooze. Vienna and Luxembourg are considered the best; with Washington, Paris, Rome and London the worst. Canberra has also been named the second-most hygienic capital in the world. The judges obviously didn’t run a black light over Parliament House then.

Andrew Barr.

Grave affair

A state funeral will be held for James Gobbo at St Patrick’s Cathedral on Tuesday. After celebrating the life of Bert Newton last week, it’s now the turn of Victoria’s 25th governor. As with Moonface’s farewell, the question being whispered around Melbourne society is whether an estranged family member will make an appearance – infamous gangland lawyer Nicola Gobbo. Sir James’ niece went into hiding three years ago after police repeatedly warned she was at “almost certain” risk of murder because of her role as a police informer. Gobbo snitched on clients Tony Mokbel, Carl Williams and Rob Karam as well as mafia figures. After returning to Australia in 2019 to assist the royal commission, Lawyer X and her two children disappeared overseas. Victoria Police has reportedly been paying for her accommodation and security, but she owns five properties in Melbourne’s southeast. Could she have snuck back into the country? Sir James previously said the pair had not spoken in years. Maybe Gobbo will follow Matthew Newton’s lead and write a letter to be read aloud.

Nicola Gobbo.

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